How Crissy Got His Groove Back

[Alana]

"No," he said.

I stood up and came nearer him, so he could smell my perfume.

"I think you would," I said. "I remember all the times you tried to kiss me. I think you still want to kiss me. Why not do it now? Wouldn't you like to find out what it's like to kiss me?"

"My parents might come in."

"Oh, so that's all you're worried about?"

From the bottom of the stairs I heard Beryl calling up, "Come on down, you lovebirds! Dad's got the game all set up."

"You hear that!" he said. "They already think something's going on!"

"Well, they might as well be right, then."

He headed for the door. Before he left, I said, "Joey, you haven't said a word about my new dress! I bought it just for you!"

[Alana]

"It's fine."

"Just fine? Does it give you any ideas? Does it make you think of things you'd like to do to me?"

He left. I followed him downstairs.

"Mum, you know nothing's going on between us, right? You know I've got a girlfriend? You've seen her."

"I know that, silly. He's a man!"

Karl had a sick look on his face.

The next day was another one of those days when I had to work at home. I used to say that I "got" to work at home, but since I had no one to look at me and appreciate me in my sexy dresses, it was just frustrating. I put on a short sleeveless red and black dress, something that Joey would like to see me in, because I intended to go visit Joey that afternoon.

I made a little sign that said "Be My Valentine." I also picked a rose from my garden. Around three o'clock I went over to his house and let myself in. I arranged myself on his bed and waited for him. I made up my mind I was going to be patient and not call out this time, just let him find me whenever he did.

I'm sure you think this is all very stalker-like behavior. I suppose you're probably right. But I couldn't help myself. I had to have him. And I knew he wanted me too, no matter how much he denied it. I could see it in his eyes.

I heard him coming in the house and up the stairs, but he wasn't alone. He had a girl with him. His new girlfriend, no doubt. They were talking and laughing all the way up.

I didn't panic. I kept my cool.

When they saw me, I said, "Hi, handsome!"

[Alana]

She wasn't prettier than me. And she didn't have prettier legs.

She frowned.

"Who's this freak?" she asked. I was a little disappointed that she'd figured out so fast that I'm technically a man. But then, I never made any attempt to disguise my voice.

"I told you to leave me alone!" said Joey. "Get out of here!"

"Why don't you ask her to leave, and we can discuss it?" I said.

"No problem!" said the girlfriend. "I don't know what's going on here, but I don't want any part of it. The bloody rumors about you are true, you bloody poof!"

She stormed off, down the stairs, and he went after her, trying to stop her.

I got down off the bed, making sure my skirt didn't ride up, even though there was no one there to see my knickers. I checked myself out in the mirror, then went downstairs to the living room in time to hear the door slam.

I sat down on the couch and crossed my legs. He came back in and stood before me.

[Alana]

"Darling, why are you wasting your time with her?" I asked. "You know I'm prettier than she is."

"She almost broke up with me, thanks to you."

"You mean she didn't?"

"I convinced her to give me another chance."

"Joey, it's OK with me if you want to date both of us."

He sat next to me and put his hand on my leg. There was that familiar sexy sensation as he started to stroke my leg. He tried to put his hand up my skirt, and this time I let him.

"Let's go outside and talk about this," he said.

We went out to the patio. I sat down on an uncomfortable iron chair, while he paced back and forth. The wind was blowing up my skirt, just a little.
   
"OK," he said. "I admit it. I can't help being attracted to you. You are so sexy and beautiful and feminine, I can't help myself. But we're going to have to be discreet. I want to keep dating Estella while I'm seeing you."

"Very well. But I want a date."

"A date? Really?"

"I want to get all dolled up in a posh frock and go to an expensive restaurant with you. Don't worry; I'll pay. I'll give you the dosh and you can pay yourself when the bill comes. How about 'La Petite Maison'? Doesn't that sound like fun?"

He looked reluctant.

"You can tell your parents that you're going out with your girlfriend."

"Why is it so important that we go on a date?"

"Because I need this to be a real relationship. I need to know that you appreciate me and that you like being seen with me. It's a girl thing. Trust me, when we get back from this date, I'll give you the greatest night of your life."

He nodded, slowly.

"I'll make the reservations," he said.

Well look at him, being all macho, taking charge!

"Sure. You decide the time."

"Can I come by tomorrow to pick you up at half past five?" he asked.

"That's a bit early. You'll have to wait for me to change. Maybe you can help me into my posh frock."

"I wouldn't mind that."

"Wear nice clothes."

A stray breeze lifted the front of my skirt up, which made him smile. I smiled too, and modestly held down my skirt. It was such trouble sometimes, wearing dresses, but so worth it.

He held out one hand, and lifted me to my feet. He put his other hand on the small of my back, and pulled me toward him. He wanted to kiss me.

"I don't believe in kissing before the first date," I said.

The next day was Friday, the day when voting was to take place. My fate was to be decided.

I put on a pretty lavender chiffon dress, not very appropriate for the workplace. I hoped Lauren would complain to me about it, and she didn't disappoint.

She looked me up and down, and said, "Are you going to work or a picnic? What kind of dress is that to wear to the office?"

I sighed. I looked down at my dress.

"You're right," I said. "I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how to dress. If only there were someone to help me. Someone to take me under her wing and show me how to be a true woman."

I looked at her, full of hope.

"Will you help me?" I asked.

She seemed surprised. She actually seemed to consider it, for two long seconds. Then she laughed.

"Oh, very good! Very nice! Sure, I'll take you under my wing, and be your friend, and take care of you and teach you all kinds of girly things, and help you become a woman. Sure. And then I'll vote for you and get the other girls to vote for you, too. Is that how it works? Not bloody likely. And I don't appreciate you trying to manipulate me like that."

"I'm sorry, Lauren. Really, I'm sorry. Please don't vote against me. I really need your vote. If you vote for me, I promise never to wear this dress to work again."

"Oh, don't get your knickers in a twist. I'm voting for you, anyway. I just wanted you to know I'm smarter than a bloody three-year-old."

She left, and a few minutes later I came across the chap who'd been staring at my legs on Wednesday.

I looked down at my pretty dress, and said, "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't wear a short skirt today. I promised I would."

"I don't give a toss what you wear," he said.

"Are you voting for me?"

"I'll vote for you on one condition. Stop your blasted flirting. I'm sick to death of you flirting with me. It makes me uncomfortable. You want to be like a woman, be more businesslike."

"But some of the women here are flirts."

"Most of them aren't."

I didn't think I'd be able to promise I'd never flirt with any man in the office ever again, so I only said, "OK. If you vote for me, I won't flirt with YOU any more. I promise, guv'nor. And you can look at my legs all you want, and I won't complain."

"No one wants to look at your bloody legs!"

"Whatever you say."

I whirled around, my full skirt whirling with me, and strode away purposefully. I counted off six paces, and then I turned and smiled at him. And yes, he was standing there, watching me leave.

No, you don't like looking at my legs, do you? Or my pretty dress as it swirls about my body.

The voting was carried out in a very low-tech way. A big box in the break room with a slot in it. Everyone filled out a piece of paper. I wasn't allowed to vote.

The results were announced. Of 69 employees, 46 had voted to allow me to wear dresses to work. I had a two thirds majority!

I jumped in the air, and felt my skirt flutter against my hands as I landed. I was so happy! I almost lost my balance in my high heels, but I didn't care. All the women in the office hugged me, even Lauren. Many of them said they loved my dress.

When I got home, Joey met me outside the door. I hugged him. He gave me two flowers. I appreciated the gesture, even though he'd obviously cut them from my own garden. I took him inside.

We went upstairs together. I let him go up first.

At the top of the stairs, he turned and said, "Is that the dress you wore to work? Doesn't look like something for the office."

"You, too?" I said.

[Alana]

"I just meant---"

"Never mind what you think about this dress. I won't be wearing it much longer, anyway. I have to change into my posh frock."

I went past him to the bedroom door.

"You can wait for me downstairs."

[Alana]

"I thought you wanted me to help you change."

"I changed my mind. That's a woman's privilege. This gown I bought is so beautiful; I want you to see it for the first time with me in it."

I got into my gown, which showed off my legs beautifully.

I went down the stairs slowly. I thought he'd be waiting for me down there. I wanted to make a sexy, dramatic entrance.

But he wasn't there.

"Joey?" I called out. "Where'd you go?"

Annoying kid. I looked for him out in the backyard. He was ruining my great entrance.

Finally, I heard the sound of the loo flushing. Going to the loo, while I was trying to make my grand entrance and knock his eyes out in this gown! I heard him coming up behind me.

I could still try and get a little drama out of it. I turned around slowly, as slowly as I could, and posed in my gorgeous, sexy gown.

His reaction didn't disappoint. He looked at me, his eyes bubbling over with all those familiar feelings of desire and lust, devouring me with his gaze and longing to devour me with his lips as well.

He stepped forward slowly. He grabbed me and pulled me toward him. I touched his cheek tenderly.

"Patience," I said.

"How can you talk about patience in a dress like that? How can you torture me like this?"

He tried to kiss me, and I squirmed out of his embrace.

He said, "Let's forget about dinner. We can have dinner any time, but I'll never be more in love with you than I am right now. Kiss me."

"Darling, I promise, you'll get all you desire and more after dinner, but I'm not going into 'Les Petite Maison' with ruined lipstick. Speaking of which, I should freshen my make-up before we go. Half a tick."

I sat down on the couch and crossed my legs just so. It's true, I did love teasing him and torturing him with my luscious legs. I could tell how much he wanted me.

"Darling, would you hand me my purse?"

[Alana]

He ignored my request. He came forward and stood before me.

"At the restaurant," he said, "I'm not going to be able to see your beautiful legs under the table."

"Well, then, feast your eyes," I said, and leaned back, giving him a good view.
   
I hoped I wasn't giving him a panty peek. That wouldn't be very ladylike.

"This will have to last you awhile," I said. "No accidentally dropping your knife and peeking at my legs under the tablecloth, now."

He fell to his knees before me.

"You are the most sexy, beautiful, desirable woman I have ever known in my entire life. I want you so much I can barely stand it. Please don't keep me waiting any longer."

He reached out and began to stroke my legs. That familiar electric current of sexual energy went right through me. I arched my back in pleasure, like a cat. He put his hand up my skirt. He came closer to me, his lips hovering just a kiss away from mine.

I put one manicured hand on his chest, stopping him.

"I asked you to bring me my purse," I said.

He did, and I freshened my lipstick, using my compact mirror. I held out a hand to him, and he helped me to stand.

"You took care of the reservations, right?"

He nodded. On my way to the door, he stopped me. He put one hand on my shoulder. I turned to face him.