After she helped pull off his boots, letting his tights-clad feet breathe and relax, Zoe and Richard talked until her friends got there. She'd asked him how long he'd been interested in such things, and he explained that he'd always wanted to do it, that he'd always wanted to try on dresses and look pretty, even though, as he carefully pointed out, he didn't actually want to be a girl. It was an erotic thing for him, but that wasn't entirely the reason. "This is why I never let you see what character I'm playing in some games," he added, and Zoe understood. She explained that she'd only become interested in girls recently, or maybe she just realized that she always was. Both of them stumbled over their words a lot, with awkward silences in between that were filled by Zoe's texting with her friends, and they were interrupted by a message on Zoe's phone telling her that the car had just pulled up. Richard pulled his boots back on and minced to the door to greet them.
Coming down the path were three girls. To Richard's left was a tall, well-developed blonde in a white t-shirt advertising a mechanic shop, jeans, and sneakers, and she had the sort of permanent grime that gave the impression of long experience with manual labor. To his right was a slightly, somewhat less-developed, brown-skinned girl with shiny, long black hair, wearing an expensive-looking purple shirt and skirt set with elegant flats. Unlike him, neither of them were wearing heels, which was just as well because the girl between them could never have worn them.
That girl looked to be about eleven or so, with red hair and a sea of freckles. Like the taller girl, she wore a shirt, jeans, and sneakers, but her jeans had bell bottoms and were obviously oversized to fit something under them. She walked like a frail, old woman, taking one careful step at a time, and Richard immediately realized that this girl had serious mobility problems and was walking between them so that she could be caught if she fell. Before they arrived, Richard had envisioned girls very similar to Zoe, of the same attributes and general height as her, with the same brown hair and blue eyes he and his sister shared. It hadn't really occurred to him that they might look completely different from her and each other, and it certainly hadn't even crossed his mind that one of them might be disabled.
"He is so cute, he is soooo cuuute!" the girl on the right squealed on seeing him as the middle girl smiled at him deeply, her mouth opening in sheer joy.
"Wowwww. I thought those were Photoshopped. He's actually wearing that, no, he actually WANTS to wear that. Holy shit, Zoe," the girl on the left said.
Zoe introduced them from left to right, and he jingle-curtsied to each in turn. "Richard, this is Caroline, who just turned seventeen, Leslie, fourteen and a half," Richard was surprised but understood at once: whatever disease had done that to her had also stolen her puberty. "Susie, fifteen and a half. Be careful, there's a step," she added.
"Zoe, I wet on the way here," Leslie said softly, as her friends gently, carefully moved her up the single step, a step that Richard had taken thousands of times without even thinking about it.
"Our only bathroom's upstairs," Zoe replied. "I'll get you in the kitchen." Richard saw that Zoe did some things with the braces on the girl's legs, lowering her onto the floor, and then he looked away.
"What's...?" Richard asked quietly.
"Duchenne muscular dystrophy," Caroline replied solemnly. "Very rare in girls, Leslie just happened to get unlucky. She's had it since she was nine. It hasn't hurt her brain, thank fuc-king God."
Richard took a breath. He was an intellectually gifted and unusually internet-savvy thirteen-year-old boy, and he thought of himself as as a true swimmer of the waves, having experienced all the sick and disturbing content that he could find just because he was thirteen years old and wasn't supposed to be looking at it. A small fraction of that was diaper fiction, some of which involved genuinely horrific scenarios. A few times, he'd been so disgusted with the story, and himself for reading it, that he'd stopped reading out of fetishy interest and continued out of pure morbid curiosity, simply because it was there and he wanted to see how bad it would get. For someone to actually inflict that kind of total, permanent helplessness on someone else would be unfathomable, Mengele-tier evil that couldn't be adequately described with the word 'sadism'. This disease had done that and more to a nine-year-old girl without giving her so much as a safeword.
"Totally incontinent?" he near-whispered. He knew it was bad manners to talk about her behind her back, but to say this stuff out loud was unthinkable.
"She lost bowel control earlier this year," Caroline said quietly. "The urine's bad enough." There was silence, for a bit, as Zoe applied wet wipes and powder.
"You're already wearing a dress, do you want to know what this is like?" Susie softly asked, straight-out. "Personally?"
The Christmas dress was still just clothes that his sister had been threatened into wearing only once; the idea of fetishizing part of someone's actual disability, in person, was appalling and disturbing. "Wouldn't that be making fun of her?" he whispered.
"Let's ask her," Susie replied as Leslie and his sister came back from the kitchen. "Hey, Leslie, Ricky wants to know if it's okay for you two to be diaper buddies," she said blithely, and Richard stared at her in surprise.
She smiled at him. "Sure, I'd like that," she replied in her weak voice.
"Just so you know, Ricky, I did this for a week," Zoe added. He went from staring at Susie to staring at her - his sister was in diapers for a week, and he never knew?! "It was gross and terrible even though I changed myself, I wouldn't wish it on anybody, and I was worried that you or Mom would find out," she continued, to his shock. "And in case you didn't know, I've been putting absorbent stuff in my pants for a few days every month for almost a year now." At first, he didn't know what she was talking about, and then abruptly he did.
"You keep dressing like that, and you'll learn more about that last part," Caroline teased him.
"I'm not really a girl, and I'm not gonna be," he said, and his slightly pouting, made-up face garnered light giggles, particularly from Leslie. "Leslie... will this actually help you?"
"I just want the people I'm with to know what it's like," she said. "Just a little part of it. You can stop whenever." There was a very faint trace of bitterness. Her friends got to stop wearing diapers whenever. She did not.
"I'll do it until Mom gets back," he agreed. "She'll probably find out if it's me doing it near her, and if she finds out about this, any of this at all, it's gonna be..." He looked to the girls, trying to think of suitable words. "Catastrophically, cataclysmically, grounded-forever bad." He tried to put his finger across his throat in the cartoon throat-cutting gesture, but he was still wearing his mittens so it just looked silly.
"Then we should make the most of the time we have," Caroline said. "Do a twirl for us." Richard did so, spinning his dress around while turning on his heels, and although he was sure he didn't do it properly, the girls clapped anyway. "This isn't even embarrassing for you, is it?" she asked.
"It's not. If other things were different, it totally would be, but it's not."
"Good, because unlike what your" Caroline did not really say the words 'crazy-ass', but Richard heard them. "mom did to Zoe, we are not going to humiliate you in public. But what we are going to do, is, well, Susie?"
"We're going shopping," she said as the washer dinged.
"Perfect timing. Ricky, go put the clothes in the dryer, but don't put another load in the washer, we don't want the clothes to mildew," Zoe told him.
He could have said no, that any going out in public dressed like a girl at all was actually humiliation, that this was seriously going way too far, and Zoe's friends would have accepted that because they were people, not monsters. Instead, jingling to their amusement, he minced off to put the wet laundry into the dryer like his sister had told him to.
Since all he was doing was moving clothes from one machine into another, even with his mittens, it didn't take him that long, so he returned to the living room as Zoe came back down with clothes, both his and hers. He stood off to the side, enjoying the thrill of letting them pick for him. Leslie, he noted, was making the decisions, and he was surprised at them. His sister's shoes were too small for him, so he'd wear his white sneakers and a somewhat skinny pair of his jeans that he usually eschewed. He'd also be wearing one of his sister's shirts, a pink one embroidered with blue waves, that he'd never seen her actually wear. A pink ponytail placed on top of his head and a change of makeup, turning the red lips into something more subtle, completed the effect. Leslie had been spot-on with her choices; in the mirror, he saw nothing but a modestly dressed girl a bit younger than himself, somewhat tall in stature but who hadn't yet hit puberty and wasn't trying to be super girly.
"You get shotgun," Caroline told him as they walked out together, the others helping Leslie down the step. "You're the broadest of all of them, and Leslie needs room." The front seat was definitely comfortable, and he realized that he wasn't worried at all about being seen.
"Speaking of which," Susie said as they got into the back seat, "No, wait, first, Zoe, did you tell him Rule 1?"
"I didn't, I figured you should," Zoe replied.
"Okay. Richard, Rule 1 of being my friend is that you cannot talk to me about money. At all. You cannot ask for it, you cannot ask for anything gained with it, you cannot so much as mention it. This rule is absolute. I have lost so many friends over this stuff and I don't want to lose more."
"I understand," Richard said. He didn't just understand the rule, he understood why it existed. He got the impression, just looking at her, that she was very, very rich. If he were very, very rich, he would probably have a similar rule to keep moochers away from him.
"Okay, I have heard from a trusted friend that a babysitter tried to sissify a ten-year-old with a bondage dress and his twin sister grabbed a shotgun and almost blew the babysitter's head off with it. Do you believe this happened?"
"I don't. It's not that I think you're lying, I just really doubt whoever told you about it," Richard explained. "And I know there's weird real stuff out there, I've seen some of it online." That was an understatement. He had seen very real human monsters, even had one on his Discord friends list, because he had gone looking for them. Knowing that such things existed made being seen in girls' clothes seem much less frightening.
"Right, fine, I'll see if I can get better proof," Susie replied, shrugging. "Maybe you all are right, maybe she really is BS-ing me." She shifted the conversation over to what Zoe has asked him, how long he had worn dresses and how long he had wanted to wear them, and he found the questions only somewhat easier to answer the second time around.
"There's the store," Susie pointed out after a while. The store she pointed to was a thrift store festooned with Memorial Day advertisements and promises of discounts on already cheap stuff. The store had just reopened after the outbreak. No one asked why she picked a thrift store; to do so would be to indirectly violate Rule 1. "It's all luck. You can find nothing or you can find everything," she explained anyway. "But since they've been getting donations they can't sell for the last couple of months, it's probably more everything than nothing."
Caroline parked and Richard did not hesitate in stepping out. This was his first time outside in girls' clothes, but he knew that no one was looking nor cared, nor would they, not when Leslie would catch far more attention with her limping, elderly movements. (It briefly crossed Richard's mind that the actual elderly didn't deserve this any more than she did.)
"Okay, everybody, if you see something you like, go ahead and grab it," Susie said. "Just don't go crazy." This was the flipside of Rule 1. Her friends weren't allowed to question her generosity any more than they were allowed to ask for it.
Zoe went with Leslie, staying close to the disabled girl and letting her pick out anything she thought would be nice for either of them. Caroline simply browsed, looking for knick-knacks rather than clothes. Richard actually took the opportunity to snag some ordinary boy clothes he liked; people would have noticed a boy in the girls' section, but nobody noticed an ostensible girl in the boys' section.
Susie went through the racks of girls' clothes, but she was more interested in the back room, a place of still-bagged clothes that had not yet been processed, and that was where she hit the jackpot. A baby pink, knee-length dress with puffed sleeves and built-in petticoats, a pair of rainbow scrunchies, a pair of pink ruffled socks, and a pair of shiny Mary Janes with one and a half-inch heels were all in the same bag, which was labeled "Donation from GAS". (She chuckled at the acronym but had no idea what it could have possibly stood for.) Excited, she motioned Richard back there to try the shoes on, and they fit perfectly. She squealed in delight. She held the dress against him, and as it was at least approximately his size, she decided to buy it; if it didn't fit, she'd alter it herself. The place was an absolute treasure trove, even better than she'd hoped. She also selected a pair of Santa boots with four-inch heels that also fit him fairly well - they both laughed at the idea that he'd grow into them - another pair of pink, four-inch heels, a pair of wedge sneakers with two-inch heels, and multiple dresses in varying colors and lengths, along with a bright pink purse and a childish pink backpack with sparkling rhinestones.
By the time she was done picking out stuff, the others had been ready for a while, and she paid for them all without question. This was a thrift store offering discounts, so the price for all of it combined was fifty-something; she reached into her well-stocked billfold in her well-stocked purse, handed three twenties to the elderly cashier, and told her to keep the change, to her surprise and thanks. The place was owned by a local charity that had been hit hard by the pandemic, after all. Susie's face was a beacon of pure glee as they walked out with their bags.
They very briefly stopped at a craft store. Susie went in alone and came back out in three minutes. "It's a surprise," she said.
Their next stop was a gas station; Caroline went in to pay with the twenties that Susie simply handed her, and she came back to the car with cups of crappy gas station hot chocolate and small, unhealthy snacks. Between sips, she talked about the last time she worked on her car and what her father had taught her about transmissions. Richard noticed that it was kind of odd listening to a girl talk about cars, but it was probably less odd than a boy in a dress, and she was kind enough to strictly avoid obvious, contextual 'tranny' jokes.
Their next destination was a grocery store, and on the way, they realized that Richard used Discord but wasn't in their group for some reason, and the Squad was then formally a group of five. "I don't think I can walk all this. You don't need to bring me." Leslie said as Caroline parked.
"If you're staying, I'm staying," Zoe said firmly. "You know that."
Caroline popped open the trunk to retrieve a wheelchair, and her voice was a combination of calm and firm. "Leslie, we've been over this. You are not a burden, and you are not a liability. Do you actually want to sit in here by yourself while the rest of us go in there?" She shook her head. "Then c'mon out." She did, and the other girls helped her into the chair. Richard would have helped, except he had no idea how her leg braces worked.
"If you want me to, I'll push," he offered.
"It's okay, Ricky, Zoe's good for this stuff," Leslie said, smiling fondly, and they walked in together. Richard realized, then, that they had made him one of them. He wasn't a circus freak, he wasn't a plaything or a doll to them, he was someone they actually cared about. He was a boy, and they all knew he was a boy, and although they were pretending otherwise to the public, they weren't pretending among themselves. They had welcomed him, not humiliated him, for what he was. He had a group of friends, one he had never had, one he never knew he wanted. He realized that he would have done anything reasonable, as well as a great many unreasonable things, if they had so much as asked. He was expecting them to want to parade him around in frills and lace, and instead, he was walking around like a modestly dressed girl, all the attention on the girl in the wheelchair that his sister was pushing in the grocery store.
This destination was actually Caroline's gift to Susie than the other way around, as she was primarily shopping for herself, selecting ingredients for recipes only she knew. As before, the others bought lightly. Caroline's family had plenty at home already, for Leslie, it was more about what she could and should eat than what she wanted to eat, and Zoe made a point of picking up the burritos that both she and her brother found tasty and easy to make. Susie paid for everything, again, and this time Richard was used to it.
That was all; the group was basically done for the day. Leslie had to get home and take her pills, and Caroline also had to be home fairly soon. "Hey, Ricky, want to spend some more time at my place? You live less than a mile from me," Susie told him to his surprise.
"You want to say yes, believe me," his sister advised.
"She's got a massive crush on you," Leslie told him, and Susie turned to her in exaggerated shock. She wasn't supposed to just blurt that out!
"Okay, you've talked me into it," he said, and they all laughed. Leslie's home was, as expected, on one floor with no steps, and Richard stayed in the car as Zoe pushed Leslie to her door. Her parents thanked Zoe, as Richard was sure they always did, for being so good to her.