The Equality Center by Robyn Jodie

[archives]

The Equality Center by Robyn Jodie

part 1

About The Equality Center, a Prolog
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The Equality Center is a school and day care center. It is called the Equality Center because it is dedicated to promoting total equality between the sexes. At The Equality Center, you don't ask whether someone is a Girl or a boy. You don't tell whether you are a Girl or a boy, either. Rest rooms are equipped with airline style toilet stalls which are completely enclosed and are either "free" or "in use."

If you wear pants and a shirt, they refer to you as "he" and call you a boy. If you wear a dress (skirts and blouses are not allowed, only dresses), they refer to you as "she" and call you a Girl. When you start at The Equality Center, you are assigned a "unisex" name, preferably one derived from your legal name. The term "unisex" is stretched slightly to include names like Alison, Gail, and Lindy, which are usually Girls' names but are sometimes given to a boy.

The rule for hair is "long but not too long." You can't start at The Equality Center till your hair is the right length. Once you have started, if your hair grows too long, your parent (or whoever picks you up at the end of the day) gets a notice saying your hair needs trimming. After a week of such notices, you are sent home with a notice saying you will not be allowed to return till you get your hair trimmed. If you get your hair cut too short, then you must offset the boyishness of the haircut by dressing in Girls' clothes all the time till it grows out.


Tuesday Jan 11
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My name (my REAL name) is Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie. My first name is Robyn Jodie, not Robyn. I am 12 years old and I am a boy. I have to tell people I am a boy because Robyn Jodie Alison sounds like a Girl's name. Today is my first day at The Equality Center. Mom registered my sister Caroline and me several weeks ago; Friday she got notice that we could start today. The people at The Equality Center wanted me to use "Alison" as my "unisex" name because they said Robyn Jodie was "too much of a Girl's name." This was embarrassing because I am a boy and Robyn Jodie is my real first name. They finally agreed to let me use my real name, Robyn Jodie. Mom says that my "switch day" is Monday but nobody told me what a "switch day" is.

It is tough starting out in a totally new environment and having to make new friends but I, Robyn Jodie Alison, have already joined with a group of four other boys: Alison, Crissy, Lindy, and Jamie. We really hit it off. We were together all day. Alison is already my very best friend. I'm glad I didn't let them make me use "Alison" as my name! Otherwise with me and Alison it would have been just too confusing.


Wednesday Jan 12
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Mom dropped me off early this morning. I had to wait around. Finally Alison arrived. Lindy, Crissy, and Jamie came a bit later. We played together all day. We stay together all the time because we are all in the same class in school.


Thursday Jan 13
---------------

Today it turned out that Lindy and Crissy are Girls! They came to the Equality Center bare legged, wearing short dresses, white socks, and Girls' black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. What boy would go out dressed like THAT? I, Robyn Jodie Alison, feel kind of betrayed that they let me think they were boys. Jamie and Alison acted as if nothing had happened, so maybe they knew all along. I wish I had. Since Alison is my best friend, I am still playing with Lindy and Crissy, but I can't "act as if nothing had happened."

part 2

Friday Jan 14
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As usual, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, was the first one of our group to arrive at The Equality Center. Today Alison showed up in a short pink dress with a wide white Peter Pan collar and petticoats under it, white socks with lace ruffles around the cuffs, and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes like Lindy and Crissy. I am trying to be nice to her, but it is hard. No wonder Alison acted as if nothing had happened when Crissy and Lindy turned out to be Girls. She's a Girl herself! I feel bad. My best friend, who I thought was a regular boy, has turned out to be a Girl!

After school I tell Mom about how betrayed I felt about the way Alison and her friends tricked me. She reminds me how we aren't supposed to say whether we are boys or Girls. "So Alison didn't really trick you, did she?" she says. "Besides, maybe she really is a boy."

"A boy in a pink dress and black patent leather Girls' shoes?" I ask incredulously.

"You're a boy," Mom says, "and Monday YOU will be wearing a dress and patent leather 'Girls' shoes' just like your friend Alison. By the way, they're called 'Mary Jane' shoes." Mom then explains switch day to me. Apparently part of the way The Equality Center promotes total equality between the sexes is by having the students spend half of their time as "girls" and half as "boys." It seems that on Monday, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will have to wear a dress and Mary Jane shoes just like Alison, Crissy, and Lindy. The thought gives me a funny tight feeling in the pit of my stomach. Well, if I have to wear Girls' clothes, I hope I can wear something like my best friend Alison wears.


Saturday Jan 15
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This morning early Mom took me, Robyn Jodie Alison, to my cousin Gail Harwick's house. Gail two years older than me and she is a Girl. We are there to see if I can use any of Gail's outgrown Girls' clothes. I'm glad Gail is off at one of her friends' house. I don't want her to see me trying on her clothes!

Aunt Helen, Gail's mom, gives me a pair of brand new black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. They were too big for Gail when Aunt Helen bought them, but the store was going out of business and practically gave them away. Aunt Helen bought them and put them aside for Gail to grow into, but forgot about them until Gail had outgrown them. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, have to put on a pair of Girl' white anklet socks with turn down cuff tops and try on these Mary Jane shoes. They fit me--perfectly. I also try on two other pairs of Gail's old Mary Jane shoes. One pair fits me perfectly, but with no room to grow, the other is about a size too large. They will fit me by the time I outgrow the new pair. Mom has me wear the smallest Mary Jane shoes for now so I can get as much use as possible out of them before I outgrow them.

Now I have to take off my shirt, put on one of Gail's petticoats, and try on some of her old dresses. One of them is pink with a wide white Peter Pan collar. It is a lot like the dress Alison wore yesterday. I try it first, pulling it on over my head. Mom has to button it for me because the buttons are in the back where I can't reach them. She also ties my sash. Can a boy who has to wear a dress say he really LIKES his dress? I, Robyn Jodie Alison, love this one! It is short and high waisted. It is pink with short puffy sleeves, white sleeve bands, and a white Peter Pan collar. The top of the sleeve bands and the collar are edged with white lace ruffles. I think it is really neat! Once I am wearing my dress, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, must take off my pants and go bare legged like a Girl in my black patent leather Mary Jane shoes, white cuff top anklet socks, and pink dress.

None of Gail's other dresses looks very good on me. Mom has me wear my new Girls' clothes so that we can shop for more Girls' clothes for me on the way home. We stop at a department store near Gail's house. Mom buys me two more slips, two packages of six pairs of Girls' white nylon no-fly panties, and two packages of six pairs of Girls' white cuff top anklet socks. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, insist on getting socks with lace ruffles around the tops like Alison wore yesterday.

Mom is also looking for another dress or two for me. On the close-out rack we find a twin of the pink dress that I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am wearing. This must be where Aunt Helen bought Gail's. I have trouble convincing Mom that I should have two dresses just alike, but she finally gives in and lets me get the second one. She finds a really cute frilly short pink party dress, and I find a plain short pink smock-dress. While we are in the Girls' dressing room trying them on, I trade my boys' underpants for Girls' panties and my plain cuff top anklet socks for a pair with lace Sissy ruffles around the cuffs. Everything fits. I Robyn Jodie Alison, am dressed in little Girls' clothes from the skin out. Not just Girls' clothes, little Girls' clothes, and all my dresses are pink.

On our way out of the store I, Robyn Jodie Alison, go to one of the store's mirrors. It is a triple mirror: front view, plus part way around each side. I look hard. Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie: bare legged in Girls' black patent leather Mary Jane shoes, Girls' lace trimmed cuff top anklet socks, Girls' no fly nylon panties, and a frilly pink Girls' dress! I look at myself in the mirror, turning from side to side to see where my dress buttons in the back and where my sash ties in a big bow behind my back. These are really cute clothes. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will be wearing them to The Equality Center on Monday and I am glad. I love my pretty new clothes even if they are Girls' clothes!

part 3

We leave for home. As we get closer, I begin to feel funny about wearing Girls' clothes. Wearing them at Gail's and at the department store was easy. Aunt Helen was "in on it," and nobody around there knew me. But now we are in my neighborhood where everybody knows me. What will they say when they see me, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, in Girls' clothes? What will they do to me? What will my little sister Caroline say? I am going to find that out very soon.

I feel a sick lump in the pit of my stomach as the car stops. Reluctantly I step out unable to hide my bare legs, my frilly pink dress, my Sissy lace trimmed cuff top anklet socks, or my black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. I shut the car door. It locks behind me with a horrifying finality. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am stuck out in public dressed like a Girl from the skin out. I look down at my shiny black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. The lace ruffles around my socks stand out conspicuously around my ankles. Why did I want have to insist that Mom get me socks with lace Sissy ruffles around the cuffs like Alison's? What seemed like such a good idea in the store seems stupid now that I have to go out where my FRIENDS will see me like this.

The walk from the car to the house seems endless. I don't want to run or do anything to draw attention to myself in Girls' clothes. One of my friends sees me, but he looks away. He doesn't recognize me because he is not expecting to see me, Robyn Jodie Alison, dressed like a Girl. As I go through the front door to safety, I see him turn back toward me looking puzzled. Quickly I close the door behind me. I am home safe, indoors, out of sight.

Not quite safe: before I can sigh my relief Caroline comes up. She goes to The Equality Center with me and she knows where I have been and why. She has spent the past week in girls' clothes, and she knows that on Monday I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will be wearing a dress and Mary Jane shoes and she will be wearing pants and a shirt. She has a grin of cruel delight on her face as she looks me over, taking in my frilly pink dress, my bare legs, my cuff top Sissy anklet socks, and my black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. She pulls up my dress to see my Girls' white no fly panties. I stand there burning with humiliation.

"Oh, this is rich," she says. "Robyn Jodie dressed from the skin out like a little Girl! those shoes, those socks, I love it. You look so pretty in pink, Robyn Jodie. You should have been a Girl. All you need is little pink bows in your hair!" She hurries off to her room and returns in a flash with pink bows for my hair and a hair brush. Mom helps her fix my hair in a Girl's style and tie those little pink bows in it.

"Now you look like the perfect little Girl," Caroline says. Then she tells me I am a Sissy Girl, a tomboy in reverse, because I am dressed from the skin out in little Girls' clothes.

At Mom's insistence, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, have to wear my Girls' clothes and hair bows all weekend "so I will be used to them by Monday." I try to tell her that it is not a matter of getting used to them, that I'll be all right. But she insists.


Sunday Jan 16
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I try to sleep in because today is Sunday, but Mom comes in at seven and makes me, Robyn Jodie Alison, put on my Girls' clothes. I get to wear my brand new Mary Jane shoes and the pink party dress Mom bought me yesterday. Mom fixes my hair with pink bows the way she did last night.

Last night I planned to spend most of the day indoors, but Mom says we need to go to church today. At church Caroline quietly makes sure that all the other Girls and boys know that I, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, am a Sissy Girl, a boy who "likes to wear little Girls' clothes." I am the object of stares, giggles, and sniggers. Church finally ends and we get to leave.

On the way home, Caroline convinces Mom that we should go for a picnic in the park today. Of course SHE changes into a T-shirt, sneakers, and bluejeans, when we get home. But because I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am a boy, I have to keep wearing my frilly pink dress and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes.

After we get home from the park, I hide out in the family room, quietly watching television. Caroline goes outside and tells everyone in the neighborhood how I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am a Sissy Girl and invites them to come see me in my little Girls' clothes. Soon most of the other Girls and boys my age come to see me, Robyn Jodie Alison, dressed like a little Girl. I hadn't wanted anyone to see me, but Caroline didn't ask. She just brought in the neighborhood kids to look at me all dressed up from the skin out like a little Girl. They all laugh at me. They think it is funny to see me bare legged in a frilly pink dress and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes with pink bows in my hair. They call me "Robyn Jodie Girl" and "Mary Jane Sissy Girl."

Caroline is delighted. She pulls up my dress to show the other kids that I am even wearing Girls' panties. This is the ultimate humiliation for a boy! Eventually Mom calls dinner and the neighbor kids have to leave. Will I ever be able to face the other boys in the neighborhood again?

part 4

Monday Jan 17
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Today is the day I have spent the weekend being prepared for, the day I, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, get to go to The Equality Center dressed from the skin out like a little Girl. I don't know if my friends there are Girls or boys, but we will all be wearing Girls' clothes today and getting treated like Girls.

This morning I, Robyn Jodie Alison, actually feel anxious to put on my little Girls' clothes. I get up earlier than usual, take a quick shower, and hurry to my room to get dressed. I put on my white socks with lace Sissy ruffles around the cuffs. I buckle on my black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. I put on my petticoat and my pink dress like the one Alison wore Friday. I put on my no-fly panties. I brush my hair, then tiptoe to Caroline's room to have her help me button my dress, tie my sash, and fix my hair bows. Wearing a dress makes me feel so helpless! I can no longer even get dressed by myself.

I love my Mary Jane shoes: they are so pretty and shiny. Despite the humiliation, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, think I would rather go bare legged in my panties, dress, and Mary Jane shoes than wear trousers and boys' shoes. I feel all happy and bubbly inside. I want to go knock on the doors of the other boys in the neighborhood, the ones I have spent the whole weekend hiding from, and tell them "Look at me! Isn't this great? These are the best clothes I've ever worn. Don't you wish YOU could wear little Girls' clothes like me?" But I know they wouldn't understand. Instead I simply take a walk dressed in my wonderful beautiful little Girls' clothes.

I slip out the front door, turn left, and head up the street. My Mary Jane shoes gleam brightly. It feels great to be walking around in Mary Jane shoes--to feel straps across my insteps. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, love the feel of the morning breeze on my bare legs and around my panties. When I reach the end of my block, I cross the street and keep going up the next block. The block is long, but I go up all the way to the next corner. There is an alley about two thirds of the way up. As I pass it, I see Loren Robins across the street out in front of his house. He is about 9 year old, the only boy in a family of five Girls. At the corner I, Robyn Jodie Alison, cross over to Loren's side of the street and head back homeward. Loren is still out in front of his house as I approach it again. I say "Hi."

At first Loren doesn't recognize me because he isn't expecting to see Robyn Jodie Alison, a boy, dressed in little Girls' clothes. Then he does almost a cartoon double take. "Robyn Jodie?" he asks hesitantly, "what are you doing in those GIRLS' clothes?"

"It's my new school," I explain. "Everybody wear pants half of the time and dresses half the time. This is my week for dresses. I know it looks weird--it feels weird too. But actually, it's kind of neat. I never thought I would actually LIKE wearing a dress, but I love it! There are no restrictions of movement at all on my legs."

"I can't believe this," Loren says. "Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie in a dress and little Girls' Mary Jane shoes--and you say you LIKE it?"

I, Robyn Jodie Alison, look down at my bare legs and my black patent leather Mary Jane shoes. "I like the shoes best of all," I say. "Maybe I can wear them with my boy's clothes. If you can find some of your sisters' that fit you, try them--they're really cool shoes!"

Loren looks at me as if I had suddenly gone completely insane. He shakes his head.

Grinning, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, wave goodbye and head back down the street. As I walk, I feel the breeze around my bare legs and panties and I am very conscious of the delightful feel of my Mary Jane shoes on my feet. Since it is still early, I keep going past my house and down toward the other end of my block. I cross the street and head up the next block. This time instead of just turning around at the end of the block, I turn right, as if I were going to my old school. I turn right again at the next corner, heading home now. As I approach the third corner, I see Kathy Martin from my old school, who lives in the corner house. She was in my class before I started at The Equality Center. She is watching me closely as I pass her house and turn the corner on my way back home. She is wearing a red and black plaid dress, white cuff top anklet socks like mine but without the lace ruffles, and brown shoes like my Mary Jane shoes but with two straps across the instep instead of one. In spite of my pink dress hair bows and black patent leather Mary Jane shoes, Kathy recognizes me. "Robyn Jodie?" she calls as I round the corner. "Robyn Jodie, wait! I want to talk to you! What are you doing dressed like a Girl? Is your mother punishing you or something?"

I stop. Gesturing down at my frilly pink dress, my petticoats, my bare legs, my frilly socks and my shiny black patent leather Mary Jane shoes, I explain, "It's the new school I go to. They want boys and Girls to be completely equal, so the boys have to wear dresses half the time and the Girls have to dress like boys half the time and you're not supposed to know who is really a boy and who is really a Girl."

"How weird," she says.

[archives]

part 5

It is pretty late, and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, don't want to get Mom mad by making her late. So I tell Kathy I've got to hurry, and I head back home at a brisk walk. I don't meet anyone else.

When I get home, I grab a quick breakfast and Mom takes Caroline and me to The Equality Center. Since Caroline and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, have the same Switch Day, Caroline is wearing pants and a shirt with dark socks and boys' shoes.

As usual, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am the first one in my group to arrive at The Equality Center. Today we will all be alike again, only this time we will all be dressed like Girls. Alison arrives about 15 minutes after I do. She is wearing a light blue dotted swiss dress with a lace edged white Peter Pan collar and a white front yoke that is pleated outward from the center with a lace ruffle edging each pleat. It really looks cute on her. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am so glad to see Alison that I run to her and give her a hug. Hugging her seems so natural now that both of us are "Girls," but when we were still "boys" I would never have hugged her. Not only am I, Robyn Jodie Alison, dressed like a Girl, I am starting to feel like a Girl, think like a Girl, and act like a Girl.

After greeting Alison I tell her how much I like her pretty dress. We talk for another 10 minutes or so till Lindy, Crissy, and Jamie arrive. Then we all talk and play together.

Several minutes before the bell for school, Alison, Lindy, Crissy, Jamie, and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, are jumping rope. A boy (at least he's dressed like a boy) comes up to us. "Could you Girls move over a little so we can play here too?" he asks.

I tell him we'd be glad to. Then he tries to get us not just to move over but to go to a different area. I brush my dress with both hands. "Look," I tell him, "just because I am a Girl does not mean I am stupid. We'll move to let you in, but we won't move out."

As he is walking back to his friends, he points to me, Robyn Jodie Alison, and says, "Watch out for THAT Girl, she's a real witch!" As far as they are concerned, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am a Girl and so are Alison, Jamie, Lindy and Crissy. More, than that, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, just SAID I was a Girl!

Soon the bell rings and we line up for classes. The rest of the day is uneventful. Alison, Lindy, Jamie, Crissy and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will all be "Girls" till Thursday when Lindy and Crissy have their Switch day. We have a good time playing together.


Tuesday Jan 18
--------------

Today I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will have been at The Equality Center for a full week. Last week I wore pants, acted like a boy, and was treated like a boy. This week I am wearing dresses and Mary Jane shoes and acting and being treated like a Girl. Again today I get up early, get dressed, and go out front for a walk. I am wearing my pink smock dress today. It is even shorter than the dress I wore yesterday and I am wearing a plain slip and not a petticoat under it. Today on my walk I turn right and head down the street, cross, and cross again, meaning to go around the block again, but backwards from the way I went yesterday. When I get to Kathy Martin's house, she is waiting for me. I try to wave and keep going, but she wants to talk.

"Hi, Robyn Jodie," she says, coming out to walk with me.

"Hi, Kathy," I reply.

"Got a minute?" she asks.

"Not really," I say, pausing. "I have to get home to go to school."

"I'll walk with you," she says. "What kind of school are you going to where you have to wear a dress and Girls' shoes?"

"It's called The Equality Center. It's not just a school, it's a day-care center, too. You go there in the morning and stay till your parents pick you up in the evening."

"But why are you wearing a pink dress and Girls' party shoes?"

"It's called The Equality Center because they believe in COMPLETE equality between boys and Girls. Nobody is supposed to know whether you are a boy or a Girl. They figure that the way to make boys and Girls truly equal is for everybody to get the chance to be treated both ways, so we have to spend a week in boys' clothes being treated like boys, then a week in Girls' clothes being treated like Girls, and so on. Yesterday was my first day on the Girls' side of things."

"How weird."

"It feels pretty weird to me, too: having to wear dresses and Mary Jane shoes, being called a Girl, and being treated like a Girl after living all my life as a boy." We talk some more as we walk around the block together.

When we get back to my corner, I go straight and Kathy turns right heading home. I just have time for a quick breakfast and Caroline and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, are off to The Equality Center. Nothing much happens at school. As usual, I spend most of my time with Alison, Lindy, Jamie, and Crissy.

part 6

Wednesday Jan 19
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I do not go for a walk before school this morning--it was too embarrassing yesterday to have Kathy Martin asking me about The Equality Center--and having to TALK about wearing Girls' clothes as well as just wearing them. Nothing particular happens at The Equality Center. Alison, Lindy, Crissy and Jamie are all there. Being a "Girl" isn't so bad. In fact wearing Girls' clothes is rather cool.


Thursday Jan 20
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Today Lindy and Crissy came dressed as boys again. Today is their Switch day. I remember how I felt last week when they came in Girls' clothes, and I thought they were Girls who had passed themselves off on me as boys. Well today our roles are reversed. Alison, Jamie and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, are the ones who in dresses, Girls' socks, and Mary Jane shoes, and Lindy and Crissy are dressed like boys. It's funny how boys seem to feel like they have to act superior to Girls, even when it was only yesterday that the "boy" WAS a "Girl." Will I do that too? I hope not! One thing I hope I have leaned this week is to appreciate the Girls' perspective. Boys can be really stupid about how they treat Girls.


Friday Jan 21
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Today is Alison's switch day. He is back in boys' clothes. Only Jamie and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, are still "Girls." I realized today when I saw Alison that I really don't know what any of my friends are. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, might be the only boy in the group. Or we all might be boys, as I thought when I started going to The Equality Center. I just don't know.

Now that Jamie and I are the only "Girls," Alison, Lindy, and Crissy treat us differently. Even Alison! I thought he was my best friend, but he acts as if I weren't as good as he and his friends because I am still a Girl. Jamie has been here at The Equality Center longer than I have. I ask her what is happening. She tells me not to worry, that Monday when we are all boys again it will be different. Aren't these guys learning anything from switch days?


Saturday Jan 22
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I wonder if Mom isn't carrying "Switch Day" too far. She says my Switch Day is Monday, so I will keep wearing Girls' clothes till Monday. So today I have wear a dress and Mary Jane shoes, just like I have been wearing all week. But that's okay with me--I think I actually prefer wearing dresses and Mary Jane shoes like a little Girl.

About nine o'clock, Mom sends me outside, bare legged like a Girl in my dress, Mary Jane shoes, ruffled ankle socks, and Girls "Spanky Pants" panties. She locks the door behind me and locks the gate to my back yard. I am to stay out front and "play with my friends." Wearing little Girls' clothes at The Equality Center where everyone else wears them half the time and nobody knows whether I am a Girl or a boy is one thing. Wearing them around my own neighborhood where NONE of the other boys EVER wear them and everyone knows I am a boy is something else. I wonder whether it would be better for me to go up a couple of blocks where nobody knows me, rather than face the kids I know--and who know me--dressed like a little Girl. I decide to stay. Caroline made sure the whole neighborhood saw me in Girls' clothes last Sunday, how can today be any worse than that?

                                 * * *

I underestimated Caroline's ingenuity. The other Girls and boys laugh at me. They taunt me and call me a "fairy," a "Sissy Girl," and worse. Any time I try to hide, Caroline finds me and leads the other Girls and boys to me. Any time they become less interested in humiliating and tormenting me, Caroline stirs them up again. They torment me. They pinch my rear as if I were a Girl. They stomp my insteps where my white socks showed below the straps of my Mary Jane shoes. They finally tie me up with my back to a telephone pole and leave me up there for over an hour. Every few minutes someone comes back to taunt me for being a "Sissy Girl," and hit or pinch me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 7

Sunday Jan 23
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I, Robyn Jodie Alison, get up at seven a.m. and get dressed in my pink party dress and my newest Mary Jane shoes. Mom fixes pink bows in my hair. This Sunday I know what to expect, but I think that makes it worse rather than better. Mom and Caroline get dressed up, and we three leave for church.

At church I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am once again the object of stares, giggles, and taunts. I endure it. I don't really have a choice. Here I am, a bare legged boy in Mary Jane shoes and a pink dress with petticoats under it like a little Girl. I can't very well hide what I am wearing. I just have to take whatever humiliation and ridicule the other Girls and boys want to lay on me--and there is a lot of it.

After church Mom locks me out front again. I, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, have to face the neighborhood kids dressed like a Girl. I am embarrassed. The other kids laugh at me. They flip up my dress to expose my panties. They call me "Robyn Jodie Girl" and "Mary Jane Sissy Girl." They all think it is funny to see me, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, a boy, dressed from the skin out like a little Girl.


Monday Jan 24
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Today is Jamie's and my switch day. I, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, get up and get dressed in boys' clothes again. I am wearing pants for the first time since a week ago last Saturday! But Mom is making me wear panties under them, and girls' socks, too: with turned down tops, but without the lace ruffles. Today when Alison, Lindy, Crissy, and Jamie arrive, we are all once again dressed as boys. And our behavior seems rather more boyish as well. I miss wearing my Mary Jane shoes. I know that young boys sometimes wear them--I wonder if I could get away with wearing them during my boy weeks.


Friday Jan 28
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The week has been unsurprisingly like my first week at The Equality Center. We all wore boys' clothes till Thursday. Then Lindy and Crissy had to switch back to Girls' clothes. Today Alison joined them, and on Monday Jamie and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, will be completing the group. The nice thing this week is being able to play with the other boys around the neighborhood without apology and without comment. Caroline has told them that next week I will be back in dresses and Mary Jane shoes, but that is next week. This afternoon, Mom picks me up from The Equality Center at about 3 pm instead of 5:30 when she usually gets us. As soon as we get home, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, have to get dressed in my Girls' clothes again. My Switch Day isn't till Monday, but Mom is already starting me in my Girls' clothes.


Saturday Jan 29
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Mom is making me wear Girls' clothes again today. Why doesn't she wait till Monday, my Switch Day? Or if I am going to have to switch into Girls' clothes on Friday afternoons, why doesn't she let me switch back on Friday afternoon as well? This way, I have to wear Girls' clothes for 9 and a half days, followed by only 4 and a half days of boys' clothes. Anyway, I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am back in dresses and Mary Jane shoes for the week; probably till Monday week. The other Girls and boys in the neighborhood taunt and tease me, but I an getting used to what I have to go through because I go to The Equality Center. Two boys have told me that maybe The Equality Center is right: maybe "switch days" like we have at The Equality Center are the only way to ensure that boys and Girls are treated with complete equality. But do they want to go to The Equality Center with me? Not on your life!


Sunday Jan 30
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This will be my third Sunday going to church in little Girls' clothes. Two weeks ago, I was a sensation. Last week I was the butt of numerous jokes. Today things are better; not good, just better. Eventually the novelty will wear off and my having to wear a dress and petticoat and Mary Jane shoes, will not excite much comment--I hope.


Monday Jan 31
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Today the whole team, Lindy, Crissy, Alison, Jamie, and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, are all dressed like little Girls. I am getting used to the rhythm of boy weeks and Girl weeks. And for me The Equality Center is working: there is no question that I understand the million subtle ways our society lets Girls know they are considered inferior to boys and tries to keep them in their place. I know from spending every other week and all my week-ends dressed as a Girl and being treated like a Girl.

part 8

Tuesday Feb 1
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This afternoon when I get home from The Equality Center, some of the other boys from the neighborhood are out playing. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, say hello to them. Something is different. They look at me as if I just dropped down from the moon.

"Get out of here, little Girl," Richard Landers tells me.

"Yeah," says Bobby Weider, "We don't play with little Girls!"

I thought Richard and Bobby were two of my best friends. "Hey, wait a minute," I say. "I'm not a Girl. You know that."

"Do we?" says Richard. "You sure LOOK like a Girl in your little pink dress and your shiny Girls' shoes."

"I told you," I say. "Caroline will tell you, too. At The Equality Center, nobody is supposed to know whether you are a Girl or a boy. To make sure, and everyone spends half of his or her time in pants and half in dresses. This is my week for dresses. But I'm still a boy!"

"Well, since you wear dresses this week, you're a Girl this week," Richard says. "So get out of here this week."

Bobby laughs. "Yeah, little Girl: go play with the other Girls!"

"The other little Fairy Girls," Richard adds maliciously. "The only boys I know who dress like Girls are little Fairies. So why don't you flit off with your little Fairy friends, Robyn Jodie Alison, little pink Fairy Girl in your little pink dress. And don't bother coming back when you're NOT wearing your little pink Fairy dress. We don't play with Fairy Girls even when they aren't wearing their little pink dresses and patent leather Girls' shoes."

"Hey, I thought we were friends," I say.

"You're right," Bobby says, "we WERE friends--till you turned into a Sissy little Fairy Girl."

I feel like crying. I turn and head home so they wouldn't see how upset I am. If they see me crying they will tell me that this proves I am a Girl because only Girls cry. I slip quietly home. I cry. Apparently my friends don't want to be my friends any more.


Monday Feb 7
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I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am a "Boy" at The Equality Center this week, so I am back in pants and boys' shoes. I still think 9+1/2 days as a Girl and 4+1/2 days as a boy is unfair--especially because I *AM* a boy--but that is how Mom is making me dress. Today, as soon as I get home, I go looking for Richard and Bobby, my two former friends who were so cruel to me last week when I had to dress like a Girl.

"Hi, Sissy Fairy Girl," Richard says when he sees me, "where're your little pink dress and your Girls' shoes?"

"SHE's not wearing them this week," Bobby sneers.

"Hey," I say, "give me a break. It's not as if I LIKE running around in dresses like a little Girl. Mom is MAKING me."

"Well," Bobby says, "You are a big Fairy as far as we're concerned."

"Yeah," Richard adds, "You are a Sissy Girl. You are like a tomboy only the other way round. You are a boy who dresses and acts like a Girl."

"We don't want any Sissy Girls around here," says Bobby, "so why don't you just flit back off to Fairyland. Get out of here!"

"Beat it, Sissy Girl," Richard says.

I wonder: will I ever be able to play with any of the boys in my neighborhood again? Even if I get out of The Equality Center, will they ever have anything to do with me again?

At least Caroline will still play with me. Tonight as we play "Beauty Shop," Caroline uses real scissors and cuts big chunks out of my hair. Mom practically had to give me a "buzz" to even it up.


Tuesday Feb 8
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Today when we arrived at The Equality Center, they wouldn't let me in. My hair is too short. I must go home and change into one of my Girl outfits. I am going to have to dress like a Girl during both my boy weeks and my Girl weeks until my hair grows back out. Mom takes me home. I have to change into a dress and Mary Jane shoes. Then we go back. I think Caroline cut my hair last night on purpose! She is dressed like a girl today, and I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am going to have to dress like a Girl full time till my hair grows out!

Alison, Crissy, Lindy, and Jamie missed me. They can see what has happened as soon as they see my hair and my Girls' clothes during my boy week. I, Robyn Jodie Alison, am stuck in dresses and Mary Jane shoes for months now. Why not? All my former friends call me a Fairy and a Sissy Girl. And they're right. I like my Girls' clothes better than boys' clothes. I wish I could spend the rest of my life in short pink dresses, panties, cuff top anklet socks with lace Sissy ruffles, and shiny patent leather Mary Jane shoes! I, Robyn Jodie Alison Cissie, am a Sissy Girl, a tomboy in reverse: I am a boy who LIKES to dress and behave like a little Girl. Hooray for The Equality Center.

END