âMy friends are coming over for a card game this afternoonâ, Toddâs mother told him as she was changing his nappy. âI want them to see you in your new lavender outfit.â Todd cringed. This was the worst dress ever. He looked over at his growing collection of baby dresses on a rail in the corner of his nursery. The lavender dress was mostly a ball of fluffy petticoats. The layers appeared to be countless.
He disappeared into the ball of fluff and came out the other side. His mummy pushed his arms into the puffed sleeves which had heart shapes sown onto them. Then she buttoned the dress up the back and smoothed the lavender satin over the mound of petticoats which flared from just below Toddâs arm pits. The petticoats were longer than his arms so his arms just rested on top of the petticoats and he knew from experience that to pick something up from the floor of his play-pen he had to get up on his hands and knees.
There was one huge heart sown on the front of his dress in white lace. The matching bonnet brim was also shaped like a heart. âAmazing how they managed to find tights in exactly the same shadeâ, his mother observed as she pulled the extra large lavender tights up over his ultra thick nappy. Then she held up the matching nappy cover. Another large lacey heart was sown onto the ample seat. His lavender booties had, yes youâve guessed it, hearts on either side. He knew they were able to charge a four figure sum for this, their top of the range design.
In his play-pen amongst the billowing petticoats he could really do little but sit there with his rattle pressed onto one mitten and clutching a dolly under his left arm. The dolly even had a lavender dress. In fact Todd was quite jealous of her dress which was a smart slim dress below the knees without any lacey embellishment.
Any attempt at much movement resulted in an embarrassing fluttering of petticoats, flashing of frilly nappy cover and frantic efforts to regain any semblance of order in the flurry of lace. Much easier to sit there looking cute, shaking his rattle. And thatâs really all his mummy wanted him to do.
His play-pen had been moved to the lounge right beside the card table so the ladies could admire Baby Todd and his new lavender baby dress while they played. âNow if you are a very good baby today and impress the ladies, then you can have some chocolate ice-cream this eveningâ, his mother told him. Toddâs eyes widened. Chocolate ice-cream??!! Heâd had nothing but formula for two months now.
When the ladies arrived, Todd was smiling broadly and shaking his rattle happily. âOh isnât he darling!â âI think Baby Todd loves his new dress!â Todd was cringing inside but smiling desperately outside in pursuit of the ice-cream.
Camera phones were taken out. Todd was struggling to keep the smile up. These were sure to be shared on social media. âDoes Baby Todd love his pretty lavender dress?â Mrs Hamilton asked while pointing the phone at him. He had no choice really if he wanted the ice cream. He smiled and shook his rattle for the photo. She pressed a button. âExcellent video!â Todd was mortified. He saw her press another couple of buttons, doubtlessly âshareâ and âpublicâ.
The ladies were delighted as he continued to play with his rattle and hug his dolly beside them as they played. âHe looks so happy nowâ, another lady observed. âI think heâs found his natural self now as a sissy little babyâ, his mother really pushed it. They all looked at him. He couldnât jeopardize the delicious ice cream at this stage. He gurgled a laugh.
He knew to roll over and crawl across the pen to give them a good view of the lacey heart on his butt. âOh look! So pretty!â It took him several minutes to settle his petticoats down around him again so he could resume his angelic pose, looking up through the lace of his bonnet, suc-king on his soother.
His face practically hurt after all that smiling. He was strapped into his high-chair anxiously awaiting his reward. Lucy stood on a stool to tie his lavender bib around his neck. His mother was about to open the fridge when the phone rang. She went to answer it. His mouth was watering.
Todd kicked his widely splayed lavender legs in midair impatiently as his mother talked on the phone. She smiled back at him still enjoying the lacey lavender vision. Eventually she finished her call, fetched the tub of ice-cream and spoon fed Todd.
His head almost exploded with the taste after two months of formula. He bounced up and down in the high-chair in excitement, kicking his legs and flailing his arms. His mother laughed. âLucy get the camera.â Todd didnât care about being filmed looking delirious in his lavender baby dress in his high-chair, the ice cream was so good.
A few days later he was parked in the lounge again for another visitor. This time he was in his usual prettiest pink baby dress with matching bonnet, tights, nappy cover and booties. He was under a similar promise of chocolate ice-cream if he was suitably impressive.
He gave a great performance. Smiling, shaking his rattle, shaking his frilly booty, looking up as cutely as possible in his bonnet. The lady seemed impressed. She took out her camera phone. âDoes Todd love his pretty pink baby dress?â He shook his rattle and gurgled though his soother. âDoes Todd like his big thick comfy nappy?â He rolled over and displayed his frilly nappy cover again and she was suitably pleased.
As she was leaving, Toddâs mouth was already watering with anticipation. His mother showed her to the door. He could just hear them from in hallway. âThatâs fine. I can report back to Social Services that he is perfectly happy in his nappies and baby dresses. We wonât bother you again.â
His mother came back into the lounge. Todd didnât look so happy now. He was clearly soaking his nappy. He got his ice-cream but it somehow tasted quite bitter.