He had enough of his sister pushing him around and mocking him. He had enough of his Mom letting her get away with it. He'd had enough of them and their stupid spicy food. He pointed to the garbage and recycling cans. "I'm supposed to take these out too, should I do that too Wendy? It's supposed to be my chore right?"
"I should make you, Rebekah. Let every one see what a little girl you are now, that big mean bully."
"Okay Wendy, go ahead. I don't care if anyone sees me. You tell Mom why you exposed me to the whole neighborhood dressed like this when she told you to keep it at home." He reached for the bag and pulled it out of the can, "So are you going to let me out of the kitchen or what?"
She narrowed her eyes at him, "Okay, Rebekah. Sure, that is a chore for the man of the house. It's not appropriate for the little sister busy, and stuck, in the kitchen." She pointed to the doll to emphasize 'stuck'.
"Of course Wendy," he replied.
As soon as the door shut he pulled a chair from the table and positioned it directly in front of the stove. He groaned at how full his bladder was and cursed Wendy and his mother. As quickly as he could, he stood on the chair and positioned himself carefully to maintain his balance. Then, he reached down to hold his apron away from the pot. He reached down again and pulled out metal tongs from where they stood upright in a jar with other kitchen utensils. He stood on his tippy toes, and he reached up to the high cabinet above the stove and grabbed toward the back with the tongs.
From the very back of the cabinet, Rebekah Rainbow pulled out a dusty bottle of super hot sauce that both his mother and sister had refused to ever try. It had a health warning taped to the bottle by the maker that Rebekah decided was likely there purely for novelty. It had a label with the image of a multicolored flaming skull on it almost like something from the covers of one of his Mom's records. The ingredients listed were "Distilled vinegar, Trinidad Moruga Scorpion peppers, salt, high fructose corn syrup, pure capsaicin crystals, and natural pineapple flavoring."
Rebekah only poured in around half the bottle, deciding that even a novelty health warning should be given at least a little respect. He was sick of Wendy putting hot pepper in his food and sick of his Mom laughing at him over it like it was a joke. He was going to let them see how it feels and then he wasn't going to cooperate for a single second more until he got the cursed speakers out of his ears.
When Wendy returned he had just barely gotten the chair back into place and she looked at him suspiciously. "Just tidying up, big sis. Thanks for helping me with the trash," he said with as much false sweetness as he could muster.
Her little sister Rebekah looked almost adorable in that moment, Wendy thought. He was obviously up to something she was sure. Even so, with Rebekah all tuckered out and helpless looking in his work stained apron and now crooked hat you could almost forget he couldn't be trusted even for a few moments. She was glad that the BabyGuard was there to keep him in line.
She smelled the chili to see if he had done something horrible to it, but she could see he clearly hadn't decided to solve his bathroom problem that way by the way he stood. Instead it actually smelled surprisingly good for one of his attempts. She decided she could stop being paranoid, and released him to the living room to "Play Mommy." Mercifully, she left the baby on sleep mode and he simply rocked the baby in the swing, occasionally checking the diaper. Rebekah noticed that the diaper was wet even though the baby was asleep. The baby's eyes opened as he changed it but it went right back to sleep when he put it back in the swing. He thought, "Okay Baby, sometimes you wet in your sleep. I wonder if you do it on a schedule. If that's the case, then I might wake up tomorrow just before dawn with you screaming like something out of a horror movie at me again if I don't get these things out of my ears. If not," he desperately hoped it would not come to this, "I guess I could try and wake up just before you?"
He became so lost in thought that he barely even noticed when his mother came in. She dropped her bag with a thud. "A ballet chef? That's a great idea, Rebekah!"
"No, mom! It's stupid! I hate all of this! I'm not a stupid ballet chef! Even Wendy said the tutu is a fire hazard in the kitchen!"
She laughed and teased, "No, obviously, of course. It'll be a ballet about a chef opening a restaurant. But what do you call the restaurant?" She looked to the empty stroller and saw the tutu. "You can put it back on now and show me?"
Silently he stood and stepped into the tutu as instructed.
"How was everything today?" his mother asked.
"Let Wendy tell you. She's in charge," he said moodily.
"Come on in to the kitchen, Rebekah. I'm guessing based on the state of that apron you're wearing this is another one of your efforts? Thanks for helping out. It really means a lot that you are trying to cooperate."
He felt vaguely guilty about his impending revenge before he reminded himself about the speakers in his ears and all of his humiliations that day and the day before. Even though she had been looking at him a bit guiltily the whole time, she seemed taken aback by whatever face it was he made as he waddled over.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Like you don't know!?"
"Know w..." She started to speak, but at that moment Wendy came back from the basement with a laundry basket containing a still very stained formerly incredibly pretty pastel blue and pink dress and petticoat.
"What the hell happened here today?" Elena demanded.
"Sorry Mom there was a little accident. It was, uhh, it was my fault. I'll pay the cleaning fee out of my allowance, okay?"
"Is that soda? Did you follow the instructions?"
"Yeah, Mom. I did what it said for dark soda stains but umm, there was a lot of it."
"Did you try the instructions for dark vomit soda?" Rebekah couldn't help peevishly asking.
"Ugh, we'll worry about the dress later, nobody else mention vomit. Let's eat!"
"Come on, baby ballet chef!" Wendy commanded.