PART 29
Later that night, Josh returned to his bedroom to prepare for bed. He paused in front of the full length mirror again. Without really thinking, he swished his chiffon skirt for the umpteenth time today, mesmerized by the way all its layers floated breezily around his waist. Studying his reflection, all he could see was a sissy. He gathered his ever-rustling skirt and sat down on the puffy pink stool. Leaning over, he unbuckled his strappy sandals and took them off. He wiggled his toes as he studied his petite feet clad in his white tights. Turning to his vanity mirror, he carefully (almost reluctantly?) took off his hairband and returned it to the storage box. Unconsciously, he lightly brushed his bangs out of his eyes. About the time he realized that he would need help unbuttoning the back of his dress, his mother knocked softly at the open door. She had obviously been standing there for a few moments. She didn’t speak but smiled sweetly at him. Reflexively, he pulled his knees together and folded his hands as he had been taught.
Gwendolyn’s heart was full as she admired her son perched so daintily on the stool. His white stockinged feet contrasted sweetly with the plush pink rug. She had simply adored watching the way he gently removed his pink hairband. She was thrilled to see her efforts coming to fruition. His rough boyish edges were being continually smoothed away. With his chiffon dress billowing around him, he seemed cocooned in its layers of pink femininity. Neither of them spoke. She stepped behind him and unbuttoned him while he sat demurely and watched her in the mirror. Once she was done, he stood and stepped out of his sundress. Now wearing only his ruffled tights and training bra, he hung it in the closet next to his gingham dress under his mother’s watchful eye.
Gwendolyn relished the exquisite tenderness of this moment as she nurtured her wayward son’s budding femininity. As Josh stood shyly, his mother had one more little surprise for him. He hadn’t noticed when she first entered, but she had brought yet another pair of panties and a small pink box. The panties were a silky lavender material with a fringe of scalloped white lace around the waist and leg holes.
Finally, Gwendolyn broke the silence and spoke, “Aren’t these cute, sweetheart?”
After a moment, Josh replied softly, “Yes Mommy they are very pretty.” Honestly they were pretty, and in any event he was resigned to the fact that he would certainly be wearing them soon. She handed them to him, and he held them gingerly while his mother took another item from the pink cardboard box. He grimaced as he saw the box’s label, and then he remembered his mother’s earlier remark about “other options.”
“Josh, these may help with your… accidents. These are panty liners, and they will just give you a little extra protection.” Somewhat flustered now, Josh gawked as she held up a small pink hourglass-shaped pad. “Girls around your age begin using them when they start getting their periods, and they will help you stay tidy too,” his mother explained. As the reality sunk in that he was going to wear this supremely intimate and feminine item, he felt another meager remnant of his masculinity dissolve. His mother showed him how to use the adhesive strip to secure his panty liner in his panties. As she supervised, Josh positioned the panty liner—HIS panty liner—into place on his lavender panties. Josh felt as though he was a spectator watching this all happen to someone else. He cringed even thinking the words “panty liner.”
Satisfied, Gwendolyn continued, “Now please go brush your teeth and change into these for the night. If you have another ‘little squirtie,’ your panty liner should at least keep us from having to do more laundry.” Handing him the box, she added, “and you can take the rest of your panty liners and put them with your other toiletries.” In a near daze, Josh went into the bathroom. He quickly put his pink box on the vanity and then brushed his teeth. Feeling defeated, he took off his tights, panties and training bra. Then, he slowly put on the fresh lavender panties with his panty liner. The lacy fringe tickled his thighs as he slid them on and aroused him again. He immediately noticed the feel of the liner’s extra bulk, and he also saw that it smoothed out the front of his panties so that he looked even more girlish. Even in its current state, his “little man” was more or less hidden underneath the feminine trappings. A few days ago, he was a normal teenage boy. Now, he was a sissy using his first panty liner. He belatedly realized that he had left his PJs outside on the bed.
He reluctantly emerged from the bathroom in just his lavender panties. While Gwendolyn watched happily, he picked up the freshly laundered pajamas and pulled on his delicate white leggings. Then he slipped on his crop top with the cute little cap sleeves fringed in tulle. It seemed they had shrunk slightly in the wash, so now his leggings were tighter and the top was more clingy. As he looked down at his slender legs, the pink hearts on his leggings seemed to taunt him merrily.
“Doesn’t that feel nice honey, knowing that your panty liner better protects you from little accidents now?” she asked. She had noted his initial reaction when she said “panty liner” so she was repeating the words intentionally now.
“Yes Mommy,” he replied almost automatically. Realizing that she expected a fuller response, he said, “Thank you for my… panty liners.” The words seemed to linger on his tongue as a reminder of how sissified he had become. Once he was dressed in his jammies, Gwendolyn took several photos of him in his PJs for Aunt Karen as he smiled timidly. No matter how hard he tried, his thoughts were consumed by what he was wearing underneath.
“Did you remember to tinkle, honey?” she asked him, reminding him of the earlier episode.
“Yes Mommy I tinkled earlier,” Josh answered, the childish words just adding to his discomfort.
Smiling, his mother said, “Josh I’m proud of the progress you are making. I’m so glad you chose this route. I just feel that it was meant to be, and I’m amazed at how girlish you are already becoming. I promised I would help you, and I’m going to keep my promise!” Of course Gwendolyn had no intention of letting him “choose” any other path, but she felt it was important that he come to accept these decisions as his own. No half-measures!
Josh winced at the “compliments.” Again reminded that all this had been his decision, Josh could only reply, “thank you for helping me Mommy.” Despite his feelings of embarrassment and confusion, however, he also felt his mother’s true affection. No matter what else was going on, he could feel that she genuinely loved him. Maybe it was just her unconventional way of showing it.
She insisted on tucking him in and kissing him goodnight the way she did when he was a child. “Good night Josh. Sweet dreams!” she said as she turned off the light and shut the door.
Lying in the frilly bed, Josh’s mind raced as he tried to imagine how and when he might reclaim his old life. Disturbingly, he found it increasingly hard to see a path leading back to the life of a teenage boy. At the core of it all was a nagging question: Did he actually WANT to be a sissy? He felt like Hansel and Gretel when they realized there were no bread crumbs to lead them out of the forest.
He had made a choice and a commitment. In the span of a couple of days, he now had a new girly wardrobe with more additions surely on the way. His old clothes were completely gone, replaced by dresses hanging in his closet and panties in the drawer. He was awash in a sea of ruffles and tulle. And ribbons and lace. Sandals with flowers and a gingham dress with a Peter Pan collar. He had his own pair of ruffled sandal toe tights. What normal teenage boy even knew there was such a thing as sandal toe tights? What kind of teenage boy wore anything made of chiffon, much less a dress? He wore girls’ pajamas, panties and now a panty liner. How far gone might he be after a week? Or a month? Or months? Could this go on for a year? Or more? All these “firsts” were leaving indelible marks in his brain. His first dress. His first hairbow. His first panties. His first bra.
He was not returning to his old school until at least after the summer. Instead of playing video games he was learning how to curtsey. Could he change his mind at this point and go to Sterncourt after all? He shuddered at the thought. “Definitely not,” he concluded. He knew deep down he wouldn’t choose that even if he could.
This whole town seemed destined to know him as nothing but a sissy boy. Aunt Karen knew about his choice and was thoroughly in on it by all appearances. It seemed inevitable that everyone he knew would eventually come to know him as a sissy. Trips to the hair salon and dress shop loomed. He felt more butterflies in his stomach, and he spied Penelope the doll, illuminated by a night light, sitting prettily on her bench. Mentally exhausted, Josh drifted to sleep.
� 
Topic: New Arrangements for Josh (Read 119118 times)
