From our 2002 Archives:
Sweet as Candy by Tammiann
At the airport, I nervously held Aunt Meg's hand as we made our way off the plane. It had been so long since I had worn boy clothes, it now felt strange to be wearing real pants. My mother was looking all around and didn't recognize me until she saw my aunt. "Oh, Randy," she exclaimed, "you finally got your hair cut." I nodded and held my head down. "And such a nice outfit, A polo shirt and khaki pants. And you said the preppy look was no good. How'd you ever get him to cut his hair, Meg?"
Aunt Meg told her that I wanted to get it cut before I came home. When Mom looked at me, I told her that I really did. What I didn't say was that my long hair had been permed and styled all summer and I didn't want to go home with a baby-girl hairdo. When Mom asked about the change in clothes, Aunt Meg said I'd volunteered to go to Sears and let her pick out some suitable clothes. Aunt Meg didn't say that if I picked out my own clothes, they'd have to come from the girls department.
"But where'd you get the money to buy all those clothes," asked my mom. "We had a garage sale and Randy helped out by donating his bike and his hoodlum outfits to make some money." Mom just shook her head in amazement, and said how glad she was to see me looking so sharp and polite. She then joked, "Maybe we should just move to West Virginia with Aunt Meg." I nearly panicked at the thought, but calmed down when they both had a good laugh and began chatting. As we got to the car, Mom asked how I'd behaved for her. I was terrified that Aunt Meg might tell the whole story, but she simply said, "It took a few days for him to learn the rules, but after that he was sweet as candy!"
Aunt Meg just grinned at me, enjoying my fear that she'd reveal my secret. On the ride home, Mom and Aunt Meg chatted amongst themselves as I remembered my ordeal getting ready to come home. Mom said that the main reason she "farmed the kids out" over the summer was to try to salvage her marriage. Dad had lost his job and things weren't going well. Aunt Meg sympathised, saying that before her husband died in the coal mine, the strikes and lockouts broke up alot of marriages and made the bars very wealthy. "I still love Jimmie Ray and miss him alot, but life sure is easier when there's only girls in the house." Mom apologized for sending me and disrupting the balance, but Aunt Meg assured her that I'd been no trouble at all and that "it was almost if there wasn't a boy around."
Her chuckle again stirred my memory and kept me from listening in on their conversation. Two days ago, Aunt Meg said it was time to get ready to send me home and she hadn't forgotten her promise to take me to Sears. I hated going out in public and stayed in as much as possible, but had no choice in this outing. Wearing a short babydoll dress, ruffled panties, and pink anklet socks with Mary Janes; I was marched out to the car. My cousins Bonnie and April went along for the ride. Inside the store, Bonnie held my hand and led me around behind Aunt Meg and April. In the girl's section, Aunt Meg made her offer for a going away present.
"Candy, darling, since you've been such a good girl these past few weeks, I've got a treat for you. You can pick out any outfit here to wear home...." My cousins started giggling hysterically at the thought of my having to go home to New York and face my parents in girl clothes, but my shock was relieved as Aunt Meg continued. "Or we can go to the boys department and I'll pick out some clothes for you." My cousins seemed disappointed but my face sure lit up. I should have known it wasn't going to be that easy, however. In the boys section, the sales lady asked if I was in the wrong place, as Aunt Meg sent me with some clothes to take to the fitting room. I hung my head and said no, that I was really a boy. After laughing out loud, she unlocked the dressing room and I tried on several outfits, having to walk out into the store with my hair and face still made up like a girl, yet wearing boy clothes. We left the store with my new clothes in the packages and me still looking like a five-year old girl. We walked to a barber shop and Aunt Meg opened her purse.
"Here's your bicycle money, if you want to get a haircut, you can do it now." I looked inside the barbershop at the line of men and boys waiting their turn.
"Maybe he wants to keep his curly perm," said April. I told Aunt Meg I didn't, so she took me by the hand and marched me inside. The head barber, a gruff old man, yelled out, "beauty parlor's down the street, miss." SWEET AS CANDY 2 -- tammiann, 00:04:38 10/10/02 Thu PART TWO
"I know that," Aunt Meg announced loudly, getting the attention of everyone in the shop. "But my nephew here thinks he can behave himself and be a boy again." The shop went silent as the barber smiled and put me at the head of the line. There was snickering and whispers as I sat in the chair. My bare legs and panties were exposed to the store as he whirled me around toward the front mirror. With the sheet draped over me, he asked in a loud falsetto how I wanted it, "dyed or permed?"
Everyone roared with laughter as my eyes reddened. "Crew cut, please," I stammered out. He asked if I was sure, I nodded and he agreed but told me that boys didn't cry. I choked back the tears as he went to work. It had been three years since my last haircut, and I had been so proud of my "rock star look." But over the summer Aunt Meg had "styled" it so much that I only wanted to be rid of it. He said I looked like a young soldier as he splashed powder and aftershave on my neck, scrubbing off the blush and lipstick with a towel.
When I stood up and the sheet fell off, someone yelled out, "what Army is that uniform from, the pansy brigade?" Everyone howled with laughter as I paid the barber and rushed outside where Aunt Meg was waiting. She said I looked so nice that she was taking me for ice cream. I tried to say no, but before I knew it, April took my hand and we were walking down the street. It was bad enough before, but with the crew cut and scrubbed face, everyone knew I was a boy in a dress and the stares and comments were terrible. In the ice cream parlor, the neighbor boys who'd taunted me all summer had a field day. As I sobbed on the ride home, Bonnie asked, "If you're that sad to be leaving here and all your pretty clothes, maybe your mom will let you stay."
"For awhile there, he seemed so sad to be leaving." said Aunt Meg, drawing me back from my memories. "But when it came time to go to the airport, he was a real trooper." My mom again commented about how much better I looked and behaved, offering to send me back next summer. I was scared to death at the though but managed to tell her that I missed home too much to want to leave again. We got to the house and I noticed Dad's car was gone. Mom told me he was in Wisconsin looking for work at a truck factory. When I asked if we were going to move there, she said "not unless he hits the gold mine and I can leave my job."
My sister Cathy came out to the care and looked me over several times. "Is that really you, Randy?" I nodded yes, thinking that some of the clothes in the house would make me look like a tough skinhead instead of the preppie dork that Aunt Meg had dressed me up like. But I decided to wait until she left to change wardrobes, since I knew too well how dangerous it was to cross my aunt.
Todd, my friend from next door, saw me and yelled out as he flung his shoulder length-hair back out of his eyes, "Yo, Randy, I thought you went to W.V., not San Francisco! " Aunt Meg started to say something, but changed her mind and we went inside the house instead. I was glad she'd be going home the next day, and I hoped my secret would go with her.
Finally back at the airport, we said our goodbyes, and Aunt Meg prepared to get on the plane. "Oops! I almost forgot..." she said as she reached into her purse, "you wanted a picture of Bonnie and April." Mom took the picture and looked at it. "My,how they've grown. Who's that with them, she's so dolled up and pretty." My heart sank until Aunt Meg replied, "Oh that's one of the neighbor girls. Bonnie and April loved babysitting and taking care of her. This picture was taken at a birthday party in June." I really got nervous when Mom asked, "Did Randy go to the party?"
Nudging me before she replied, Aunt Meg went on, "He was invited, but what kind of boy would go to a little girl's birthday party? He just did what boys like him do..."
Everyone again hugged Aunt Meg goodbye and she got on the plane. As we walked out to the car, Cathy held the picture and kept looking at it. "That little girl looks like she could be related to Aunt Meg doesn't she?" Mom agreed and asked me what I thought. Masking my nervousness with false machismo, I blurted out that I didn't know or care. I hoped they'd let the subject drop, but Mom asked me what the little girl's name was. If I didn't answer, Mom might call Aunt Meg, so I glanced out the window and mumbled "Candy, I think." SWEET AS CANDY 3 -- tammiann, 00:17:32 10/11/02 Fri
PART THREE
Back in school, I was able to act tough and get back in with my old crowd. They teased me about my hair, but I made up the story of liking the REM band and cut my hair to be like the lead singer. Before long, the nightmare of having to spend the summer dressed like a baby girl was soon forgotten. My dad never did come home from Wisconsin, and was supposedly wandering the midwest looking for work. When he called, Mom and him always argued, and after New Year's she said she was filing papers. It bothered me and Cathy, but she handled it better, letting her schoolwork occupy her time and thoughts. I dove deeper into "hanging out" with the tough guys I wanted to be like. Since I was still very small for my age, I often had to get in the worst scrapes and take the worst risks to prove myself. After I turned fourteen, it was getting harder and harder for Mom to keep me out of trouble. I didn't know it, but worrying about me was making her work suffer, and her job was on the line as well.
During spring break, one of my friends, who should have been a senior but was left back twice, turned 18 and signed his papers to drop out of school. We broke into the school to celebrate his "graduation." We had all kinds of fun drinking beer and spray painting the classrooms. We even managed to roll over one of the cars in the auto shop classroom, but didn't notice until too late that we'd tripped an alarm that brought swarms of police and firemen. Mom was livid, and said she didn't care if they sent me to prison. I was scared, and realized I'd gone too far. The next day, mom came and got me out of jail and said that she'd try to help but wasn't so sure if she could. The school was demolished and the principal wanted to make examples of all of us. I was expelled immediately, and thus open to any number of criminal charges. That night, Mom was on the phone. I heard her grumbling that she wished I was more like Cathy, and that she wanted two good kids instead of just one. She waved me back into my room before continuing her conversation, fretting about finding a lawyer and keeping her job.
Two days later, I began to get nervous as I sat at home and wondered what would happen. My "graduate" friend was already on his way to the state prison, and several others were headed for reform school. Without my "homey's," my toughness had melted away and I felt like a scared little kid. Mom had seemed unusually calm but said nothing to me other than to express her exteme anger and disappointment. When I asked what was going on with finding a lawyer, she said she was working on it. I started to think she was really going to let me go to jail. After a week had gone by, Mom called me out of my room and had me sit on the couch. Cathy left the living room and I thought I saw her going into my room, but I kept my attention on my mom. In her hand was a letter from the schoolboard and what looked like all my old records. "I know its been rough around here with your dad being gone and all, but Cathy and I have managed. Why coulnd't you?"
I tried to beg forgiveness but she kept saying I ought to join my "friends" in prison. I was really scared by then and swore up and down that I'd learned from my mistakes and was really sorry. Mom said she hoped I was telling the truth. I assured her I was. Mom then told me that the school board would drop the charges against me if she agreed to get me some help and transfer me out of the school district, "the farther away the better" were the Superintendents exact words. Mom said she would do that and put me with someone who "wrote the book on tough love."
Almost as if on cue, the doorbell rang. In walked Bonnie, now fifteen, and April, thirteen, looking at me with evil grins. Aunt Meg came in right behind them. I stood there in shock, I never dreamed Mom would call her, being too embarrased to involve family. But, I was wrong and knew I was in for it. Mom hugged April and Bonnie, then asked them to go "help Cathy pack." As they left the room, Mom and Aunt Meg sat me back down on the couch with me. "I told you he wasn't disciplined enough," Aunt Meg said, "but he is family and we have to take care of him."
Mom agreed, asking how on Earth she'd gotten me to mind last summer. "He just had to learn the rules, sometimes the hard way," she replied. I couldn't believe Aunt Meg was keeping my secret, but was thankful that she was while scared the whole time that she was going to tell my mom and Cathy everything at any moment. "He's just one of those little boys who needs more time away from bad influences and more supervision to help him learn to act his age." Mom nodded and thanked her for agreeing to take me. Mom got out the gaurdianship permits and transfer papers and they began reading and signing them. As they did so, Mom reminded me that if I didn't behave for Aunt Meg the juvenile court judges would be happy to make other arrangements.
"Oh, I don't think there'll be any troubles.", answered Aunt Meg with a wicked smile.
SWEET AS CANDY 4 -- tammiann, 00:42:13 10/12/02 Sat
PART FOUR
I was then sent to help my sister and cousins carry the boxes of my things out to Aunt Meg's minivan. That done, we all sat down to supper, and I was sent to my now-empty room to get ready for bed. I didn't sleep well that night, but hoped and prayed that this stay with Aunt Meg wouldn't be like the last. The sun came up quickly and after breakfast we were all getting ready to leave. Mom and Cathy hugged me goodbye, offering warnings and pleadings to change my ways. I told them I'd stay out of trouble forever and all I wanted was another chance. I kept hinting for Mom to let me stay, but she said that I was getting another chance with Aunt Meg. I followed Bonnie and April out to the car and waited for Aunt Meg, who was saying goodbye to Mom and Cathy. Aunt Meg started the car and Mom rushed to the window, "Please stay out of trouble, Randy. Don't give your aunt any grief."
I told her I wouldn't and apologized yet again for my mistakes. She kissed me goodbye and thanked Aunt Meg again for taking me and hoped aloud that I wouldn't be too much trouble. "Don't worry about a think, Sis." said Aunt Meg as she pulled out of the drive, "in no time at all I'll have him sweet as candy!"
As soon as we were out of Brooklyn, Aunt Meg stoped at the first beauty parlor we came to. She marched me inside and the stares and glares I got from the other customers caused me to hang my head in shame and fear. A heavy lady smelling of shampoo and other hair products came up to us and pinched my cheek. "What brings you here young man?" she asked.
Aunt Meg answered for me in a loud voice, "From the way he'd been acting, I'd say he doesn't want to be a young man anymore," Aunt meg went on when she saw she had everyone's attention. "He can't even behave like a good little boy so he's going to have to start all over."
April interrupted, "Yeah. He's REALLY gonna walk a mile in my shoes."
The beautician then announced that while I was small enough to be a sissy, I didn't have much hair for it. My crew cut had hardly grown out. Aunt Meg laughed and agreed that the Shirley Temple look was out for now, but I should be able to manage a pixie style. The beautician agreed and sat me in a chair and wrapped me in a pink smock. In no time at all, my hair was washed and trimmed and as I sat under the hair dryer, she asked me how old I was. When I said fourteen, the beautician shook her head as if struggling to believe me. Then she said that, even with my tough boy clothes, no one would believe I was more than six or seven. My eyebrows were then plucked and shaped, giving me even more of a childish look. We left the beauty parlor and went to a McDonald's, where I was greeted with constant stares and giggles. Even worse was the fact that April kept hold of my hand and lead me around as if I were a toddler. She even made me go into the girls' bathroom, where I was cursed and screamed at for being a sissy peeping tom.
After the lunch time ordeal, I'd hoped we'd just get on the highway and I could endure the trip to West Virginia hidden in the car, but Aunt Meg squashed that hope when we pulled up to a Salvation Army thrift store. April took me by the hand and lead me to the girl's section as Bonnie and Aunt Meg carried all my stuff out of the van and into the store. As April looked through the clothes I watched my baseball cards, CD's, comic books, and clothing being carried away by a stock boy, who kept giving me strange looks. When we passed a mirror I saw why. My hair was indeed given a pixie cut, and with the trimmed eyebrows I looked like either a girl trying to dress like a boy or a wussy trying to look tough. I almost started crying. April then called my name.
"Randy, pay attention!" Bonnie yelled, "We can't pick out any clothes if you're looking everywhere else." With that she began poring over the clothes as I looked on. I was soon handed a flimsy shirt and pair of shorts to try on. My old clothes disappeared as soon as I took them off, and I was forced to leave the dressing room wearing a pink stretchy top and shorts with ruffled edges that ended way above my knees.
"Oooooh, Bongo shorts!," squealed April, "and that flirty top is to die for."
Bonnie giggled, enjoying April's sarcasm as I was forced to wear clothes that were out of date and much too juvenile for even a six year-old to wear. "But look at that bunched up mess under the shorts," exclaimed Bonnie, "Jockey's just won't do!" Aunt Meg walked up just then and agreed with Bonnie.
"Don't worry Randy, I found just the thing." Aunt Meg said within earshot of the salesgirl and several customers. Hearing a boys name being yelled out from the girls department certainly caused everyone to take notice. SWEET AS CANDY 5 -- tammiann, 00:47:50 10/13/02 Sun
PART FIVE
"See what I got for you Randy, Princess Jasmine panties! I didn't think they made them anymore, and here they are, just for you."
About ready to begin sobbing, I went back to the dressing room and got out of my old underwear and was painfully aware of the soft nylon and cartoon print sliding up my legs. After putting the shorts back on, Aunt Meg announced that she couldn't find me a training bra and promised to get me one soon. Bonnie walked up the aisle with a pair of white bobby socks and a pair of "jellies" slippers. We left the store and I knew that my outfit would do nothing but attract attention. I was completely humiliated and kept looking down at the ground. When we started out, there were ten boxes of toys and clothes in the van. Now there was only a grocery bag full of second hand girl clothes and the beat-up old Barbie doll and purse set I was given to carry. Finally we were on the highway, and heading out of New York.
As if I hadn't suffered enough embarrasment, Aunt Meg kept calling me Randy and sending me to the boys restroom everytime we stopped, making sure everyone got a look at the ridiculous spectacle I'd become. I didn't want anyone to know I was a boy, especially one so cowed by his Aunt and cousins. As we ate dinner at some restaraunt in Pennsylvania, I made the mistake of asking Aunt Meg not to shout out my name and draw attention to me.
"I can't let my little baby turn into a wallflower can I?" asked Aunt Meg as the waitress fought back the giggles while serving our food. "But since you asked so nicely, I guess I'll give you a second chance. Bonnie, and April, you heard him. He doesn't want to be called Randy any more. So what shall it be?"
All three shouted "Candy" in unison and I knew that the humiliation I suffered last year would pale in comparison to what was to come. By the time we got to Maryland, it was getting late in the afternoon and, even if I wasn't glad to be getting closer to my new home, I was hoping that at least the trip would be over soon. We stopped at a mall along the highway, and after walking me around so I could "stretch my legs" and be gawked at and ridiculed for my appearance, we sat down at the food court for diner. People still pointed and grinned, and the tough guys who walked by always said the nastiest things. I was small for my age and not that muscular, but even with a "pixie" haircut and the grade-school girlish clothes I wore, it was still obvious that I was a boy.
Aunt Meg bought us all the supersize meal and drinks, telling us that this was our last stop before going home. Before we left, the girls went to the restroom. When Aunt Meg asked if I wanted to go, I said no, remembering the creepy old man who followed me around at the last rest area when Aunt Meg made me use the mens room. I also knew from experience that the gangstas hung out in the mall restroms to smoke and look for weaklings to beatup and rob. Bonnie joked that if I didn't need to use the mens' room then I must be a girl. Aunt Meg chuckled and said we weren't stopping anymore, so I'd better go now. I said I didn't have to, so we left the mall and headed home.
After about an hour on the road, the forty-four-ounce soda Aunt Meg bought and made me finish began to make the ride uncomfortable. I meekly asked if we could stop and was reminded that I was warned.
"Besides," my grinning Aunt said, "you don't here April or Bonnie complaining, so you'll just have to hold it like a big girl---or else."
I squirmed in my seat and as darkness fell I closed my eyes, hoping that if I dozed off, I'd sleep the rest of the way and wouldn't feel so miserable. I woke up as we crossed the West Virginia state line. The painful urge to pee was gone and I was glad of that until I noticed the warm wetness all over my lower half. April noticed the panic in my eyes and loudly asked what was wrong. I said nothing and Bonnie asked why was the front of my shorts so dark all of a sudden. Aunt Meg then pulled off to the side of the road and turned the car light on. When she saw what had happened, she began screaming at me as she got back on the highway and drove to the next exit.
We pulled into an all-night gas station and mini-mart. I told her I was sorry, but she just dragged me out of the car and spanked my bottom as she marched me into the gas station. Everyone in the crowded store pointed and laughed as they saw me. Grabbing a package of extra large girls pull-on diapers, she made me carry them to the counter. As we stood in line, she ridiculed me, saying it was bad enough that I couldn't act like a boy, but now I was acting like a baby too. We bought the diapers and April and Bonnie spread a blanket out on the sidewalk in front of the store. I begged them not to, but they made me lay down on the blanket and peeled off my soaking wet shorts and panties.
Teasing me that I'd "drowned Princess Jasmine" as she threw away the cartoon covered panties, Bonnie yanked the diaper up my legs and stood me up. Aunt Meg spanked me all the way to the van, and I cried the whole two hours it took for us to get home. SWEET AS CANDY 6 -- tammiann, 13:33:35 10/15/02 Tue
PART SIX
The next morning I woke up hoping with all my heart that the previous day had been a bad dream. But as I struggled to turn over in the small child's been in my cousin April's room, I knew it was real and not likely to get any better. I looked around the room, feeling uncomfortable with the Hanson Boys staring at me from the posters that covered the room.
"Oooooh, isn't Zack so dreamy?" April asked as she walked into the room, "but aren't you too little to be thinking about boys?"
My face went crimson and I was speechless as I was lead downstairs wearing just a babydoll nightie and the same pull-on diaper that Aunt Meg put on me at the gas station. Bonnie grinned and sang "Mommy, WOW! she's a big girl now!" bringing tears to my eyes and hysterics to the women in the house. At breakfast, April kept asking me which Hanson Boy was the cutest. Aunt Meg told her "a six-year-old who still wets herself had better not be daydreaming about boys," bringing more laughter to the kitchen.
I finished eating and asked to be excused, but when I headed for the bathroom, Aunt Meg stopped me in my tracks and told me she'd come along since she didn't want the house to look like the car seat I'd ruined. She sat me on the toilet after sliding the diaper down and stared at me, telling me to "hurry up and do your business." When I couldn't go in front of her, she ordered me out of my nightclothes and into the bathtub, where she ran a hot bubblebath. As I sat in the tub and washed, she called Bonnie in to supervise while she got me some clothes. I asked Bonnie to let me out of the tub and she grinned and shook her head no. The hot water got to be too much and I started wetting all over myself in the tub. Aunt Meg returned and saw the yellow cloud in the water as Bonnie explained.
I was jerked to my feet and with a swat on my bottom was told to stand there while she showered me off and roughly scrubbed me with perfumed soap. As I dried, she said to Bonnie, "It's a good thing we bought a whole package of diapers, Candy's sure not ready for panties yet." Bonnie agreed as she ran off to get the disposable diapers. April returned from upstairs and I looked with horror at what Aunt Meg had sent her for.
"Put it in the kitchen, April. Its the only place without carpet to ruin." I began crying as April took the potty chair and sat it in the middle of the kitchen while Aunt Meg told me I'd have to be potty trained all over again and I was not to go without asking permission. Bonnie and April giggled and joked about being able to watch me use the potty chair, and I knew they'd have their friends over to watch as well. Before the shock of that was over, Aunt Meg slid the diaper up my legs and handed me one of April's old sundresses. She handed me my Barbie doll and sent me into the living room to play. As I sat there in shock, Aunt Meg was on the phone with her neighbors, and was making plans for the summer. It wasn't long before I had to use the bathroom and after asking Aunt Meg, I was taken into the kitchen and was placed in the potty chair. Bonnie walked in as I sat there trying to go, with my diaper down at my ankles.
"No wonder you're so shy around us, your attitude isn't the only thing that has some growing up to do."
April raced into the kitchen and my face reddened even more as she exclaimed, "Listen to the tinkling, he may be potty trained in time for school!"
Bonnie replied, "I sure hope so, we have to eat in here and I don't want to have to watch a little girl go potty in the middle of dinner."
Aunt Meg, who was listening in as she joined us in the kitchen, agreed. "I think you're right Bonnie, let's put the potty chair on the back porch, we can still supervise Candy through the window." I tried to protest as she stood me up and wiped my privates with a baby wipe, but her promise to put the potty chair on the front porch so I could "wave and wee wee" as the cars drove by" silenced me. SWEET AS CANDY 7 -- tammiann, 00:13:41 10/16/02 Wed
PART SEVEN
The morning wore on and I soon tired of sitting on the floor playing dolls with April. Aunt Meg turned off the television a little bit later and announced that we were all going to a picnic. I asked if I could stay home, and Aunt Meg asked if I wanted to go next door and stay with Mrs. Reed and her five sons. They were the toughs who's tormented me all last summer and I quickly jumped up and took Aunt Megs hand to be led out to the car. Sure enough, the boys were out in the yard as we came out and Bonnie waved at them. They took one look at me and the uproar brought out Mrs. Reed, who complimented Aunt Meg on having such a darling little neice. I wanted to die as we got in the car and drove off, knowing things would only get worse from here on out. Pulling out of the driveway, I heard the jeers and one of the boys yelling"Is da wittle girl gonna cry???"
Tears actually did run down my cheeks as we pulled out of the driveway, because I knew the teasing and humiliation I suffered from them last year would probably be even worse now. As we passed the mall and the shopping centers I was grateful that we didn't stop. As we drove further into the mountains, I realized we were heading to Mrs. Melody Miller's house. She had been my "babysitter" on more than one occasion, and I was treated just like her toddler daughter Cindy. When I saw all the cars parked in the Front yard and the group of people gathered around the picnic tables, I wanted to crawl into the car seat and die. Aunt Meg saw my look of misery and grinned as she explained.
"Don't look so sad, Candy. We're having this party for you. I always wanted another daughter and now I've got one. And all our friends and neighbors are here to celebrate."
I noticed the banner in front of the house as she spoke, it read "WELCOME HOME, CANDY!" I began sobbing as the car stopped and April took my hand and lead me out of the car. Aunt Meg had told everyone that her sister could no longer handle "her daughter" in the big city and thought it best for me to be raised here.
I couldn't believe it, but most of the guests actually thought I was a girl and only a few saw that beneath the pixie haircut and sundress, something was definitely wrong. Cindy came running up to me yelling "Baby Candy, Baby Candy!" and Aunt Meg and my cousins giggled and smiled. The three-year old girl began bragging that she wore "big girl panties" and didn't need diapers anymore. I turned crimson when she peeked under my sundress and asked loudly when was I going to "go potty like a big girl."
I stammered, speechless, and Aunt Meg answered for me, "maybe this summer, Cindy, and I hope when she goes to school she'll be a big girl just like you." I hadn't even thought of school and now Aunt Meg made it clear than my punishment could last well beyond the summer. She shooed me away as Cindy took me to the swing set where the other kids were playing. Most were girls and none were over five years old. Though my outfit matched theirs, I was obviously out of place. Despite my small size, I was still fourteen and bigger than all of them. I looked across the yard and saw my teenage cousins and their friends pointing and laughing, and could only imagine what they were talking about.
I did my best to fit in with the "little ones," afraid of what Aunt Meg might do if I didn't. I shared my Barbie and played games with them, and except for my size, I was soon looked upon as "one of the girls." After a few hours my aunt and Mrs. Miller walked over to us. Cindy gushed about how nice it was to have "her baby sister back." She then announced that I was dry and wanted to know if I could wear "big girl panties" like her. Aunt Meg smiled and said that I'd been very good so far and might not need too much potty training, but she brought no panties for me. Cindy offered to give me some of hers. Mrs. Miller spoke up,
"That's very sweet, Cindy, but I don't think yours would fit Candy."
Cindy thought a moment and and answered, "What about the ones Mrs. Andrews got me that were too big? They're just like the ones I have on only bigger?"
Melody Miller looked at me and said, "We could try, are you ready to be a big girl, Candy?" SWEET AS CANDY 8 -- tammiann, 17:29:47 10/18/02 Fri
PART EIGHT
"Let's find out if she can be a big girl," Aunt Meg replied as she took my hand and headed for the house. Melody followed her and Cindy raced ahead. When we got to her room Cindy waved the panties back and forth. They were white satiny nylon with lace all over the leg and waist bands.
Cindy began pouting when Melody said she had to go back outside, telling her that "even though Candy's like a baby sister and has to do what you say, it's not nice for girls to look at each other's privates, only mommies can look. So just go on outside and I'm sure Candy will show you her panties when she's dressed."
Cindy nodded and went outside as Aunt Meg remarked on how well-behaved she was and how I'd better be just like her. Melody held the panties out to me and my eyes reddedned as Aunt Meg took my diaper off and left me exposed. The little-girl panties just barely fit, and my privates formed a tiny but obvious lump in the middle of my crotch. I was about to ask for the diaper back, but the two women marched me back outside. Cindy lifted up my sundress as I tried to turn away, exposing my bottom to everyone there.
Before Cindy turned me around, Aunt Meg pushed her hand away. Cindy asked if they were too small. Melody told her "They were just right but a little bunched up in front and that good little girls don't show their panties to everyone."
Cindy agreed, still unaware that I was really a boy, which made me happy. We went to the picnic tables, and of course I had to sit with all the little kids and Aunt Meg brought my food to me. Melody tied a bib on me and Cindy. April and Bonnie giggled as they enjoyed their favorite foods while I had to clean my plate, which was full of cooked vegetables and other stuff I hated.
I did get an ice cream cone after asking Mrs. Miller nicely and curtseying for her. Before we left, Aunt Meg thanked everyone for the party and for making her "little girl" welcome. She also thanked Cindy for helping keep me potty trained, which made me blush even more than ever as everyone laughed. I then had to thank everyone myself and loudly announce my thanks to "big sister Cindy" for giving me "big girl panties and helping me stay dry in them."
As we drove home, I sat silently in the back seat. Aunt Meg praised me for being so sweet and promised to put the potty chair back in the attic. I readily agreed and told her I'd never need it again. "I sure hope so, 'cause next time its going on the front porch and I'll ring the cow bell every time you use it." My cousins laughed out loud as Aunt Meg explained that I still had to ask permission to use the potty and could not close the door until "I was mature enough to be left unsupervised."
Tired and ashamed as I sat there in a sundress that barely covered my too-small panties, I could only agree and hope things wouldn't get too much worse.