It took Joe ages to finish his baby bottle and then his Aunt tied a bib around his neck and started to spoon feed him his milky rusks. She quickly followed one spoonful after another so even though he was free of a soother or teat, Joe hadn't a moment to speak. He wanted to plead to be let out of the nappy and baby dress but there was no opportunity.
He watched as his Aunt scrapped every last piece of mush from his bowl and shoved it into his mouth. He was ready to take the opportunity to speak but as soon as he swallowed, the soother was pushed into his mouth again. "Nnnggghhhh!"
His mother easily snapped the catch on his straps and swung the tray up to let him out. At last, he thought. But she led him to the play pen and his Aunt opened the side bars. He was quickly pushed in and the bars locked shut.
"Lots of toys for you to play with all day!" his mother told him. Joe tried to look down to see what toys were there but couldn't see much beyond the expanse of his petticoats. He had to push them down out of the way to see and they tipped up at the back. He looked over his shoulder at the mirror and his full frilly nappy cover was on show. He let his petticoats go again. They still only covered the top half of his nappy so everyone could enjoy his pretty frills.
He flopped down and his thick nappy cushioned his bottom while his petticoats ballooned around him. He patted them down and looked around his pen. There were rattles and letter blocks and a couple of large floppy dolls. He sighed.
He looked up to see his mother watching expectantly to see which toy he would choose. He sighed again. He pushed his mittened hand into the large ring on the rattle and picked it up. He looked up and shook his rattle. "Good baby", she smiled and went off to the kitchen.
The letter blocks had tinkling bells inside them and the dolls squeaked when moved. They provided little amusement for him. He sat there disconsolately. He looked out at the garden wishing he could go out and kick a football. Not wearing his nappy, baby dress and tights of course. He didn't want to go out dressed like this. Anyway, he couldn't even get out of his play pen until somebody let him.
"I don't hear any playing", his mother called in a sing-song voice from the kitchen. He winced. He picked up a letter block and it tinkled. So they could make sure that he played with his rattles, blocks and dolls continuously.
Later the costume lady returned to the house. "Sorry but I think I left my best scissors here yesterday". She was shown into the nursery. Joe sat in the play-pen in his lilac baby dress and tights and looked up through the frills of his bonnet as he shook a rattle disconsolately for what seemed like the thousandth time.
"Oh hello, sweetie!", the lady said. "You just love your baby dresses don't you?", she teased. "Can't get enough of them." Then she saw his two little-girl dresses hanging alongside his other baby dress. "My goodness you've four pretty dresses to choose from." His mother sighed a little. "Unfortunately there's no bonnet or nappy covers to go with these two", she said, fingering the lace on the peach dress.
"Oh I can whip those up for you if you like", the costume lady offered. Joe whimpered from his play-pen. "Really?" his mother asked. "Sure! I presume you'd like lace-trimmed bonnets and nice frilly nappy covers for both?" "Oh yes please!"
"Nnnngggghhhh!" Joe protested from his play pen. Why did he need FOUR baby dresses complete with bonnets and frilly nappy covers?!
"The little girl dresses may be a bit long though", his Aunt intervened, "they'd completely cover the nappy covers. "No problem", the costume lady assured them. "I can take them away and have them shortened so that they flare from just below breast level like his other baby dresses. Then everyone will be able to see the matching frilly nappy covers." "Oh you're too kind." "Not at all, my pleasure!" she beamed down at Joe. She sniggered seeing him actually suc-king on his soother to relieve his upset at the turn of events.
"It might take a little while as I'm busy with another ad coming up." "Oh there's no hurry", his mother said. "He's not going anywhere." Joe looked up helplessly from his play-pen. "I should have them in a couple of weeks." "Perfect!"
Joe whimpered and sniffled. His mother smiled at him. "Poor baby doesn't want to wait two weeks for your pretty new dresses, do you?" Joe frowned at her deliberate misunderstanding. They all chuckled.