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Mark was getting desperate. He needed a job. Mark was working the street of small businesses beginning a week ago and it was becoming painful. He was halfway down the block and only two had even taken his name.
This one, a pool service, was busy as five guys were working at loading five small pick-up trucks under the urging of a very large woman. Mark put his best face on, squared his shoulders and walked in.
Mark knew a little about pools and chemicals working one Summer for the city's Parks and Recreation Department. He girded himself for rejection while defining a face full of confidence.
"Looking for a good worker," Mark said after his good morning to who he hoped was the owner.
"I'm not hiring right now but leave your name and number and if that changes I can call you," the woman Marge said hurriedly. Mark thanked her, handed her one of his resumes and began to walk off.
"Hey, wait a second. How bad you want to work," Marge asked looking thoughtful and at Mark's resume.
"Badly. I need a job. I'll take anything," Mark said instantly.
"I mean seriously, how bad," Marge asked.
"I am being serious," Mark said curiously.
"Will, keep that thought and come into the office with me," Marge said as she tossed the flexible hose she was coiling on the floor. Mark followed enthusiastically.
"You know about pool chemicals and such," Marge asked.
"Worked one Summer for Parks and Recreation. Took care of the pool by myself," Mark said proudly.
"That's good. Got a prospective client, but I haven't followed up on it yet," Marge said.
"Oh," Mark replied not sure what else to say.
"Weird call, but I called the woman back, and she's legitimate. Hold on while I find the sheet. Actually, I wasn't even going to consider bidding this one, but if you want the work... ah, wait, here is it," Marge said after shuffling papers on her desk to find the one she wanted.
Mark waited as Marge looked the call sheet over.
"OK, it's a lap pool, about an hours worth of work, but if it pans out and you still want it, I'll pay you for five hours for that one," Marge said.
"Five hours pay for one hour? I can do that," Mark said as he added, "would that be once a week or what?"
"Nope. Woman wants the pool scrubbed daily Monday through Friday, and don't ask me why but that's what she wants. Actually, the woman wants the bottom brushed and that means doing so in the water," Marge said.
"I can do that too," Mark said excitedly. Standing in a pool to clean it wouldn't bother him and Marge had his attention over that comment about an hours work for five hours pay.
"There's a catch," Marge said.
"Doesn't matter, I'll do it," Mark said.
"Hold on, you haven't heard the weird part yet," Marge said and added, "Like I said, she's most likely a nut case, but then again she's rich so I suppose that makes her eccentric. The thing is, she wants the person cleaning her pool to wear a swim diaper of all things," Marge said.
"A swim diaper," Mark said caught off guard.
"I know. Made me nearly bust a gut when she said that, but that's the deal. Like I said, a nut, but if I bid it and get it I can guarantee that you'll get those five hours pay for that hour worked. That would be 25 hours a week pay for five," Marge said.
"A swim diaper," Mark asked trying to visualize that as he asked, "why?"
"Why? Who knows. Tell you the truth I didn't ask so I have no idea, but that's what she wants," Marge said and added, "I'm guessing she doesn't want the person that's cleaning her pool going potty in it."
"A swim diaper would do it," Mark said snickering.
"Not even sure what a swim diaper looks like," Marge said.
"I do. I mean I think I do. Never seen one for an adult. When I was a working part time for the Parks and Recreation Department they made it mandatory that kids under five wear them," Mark said and added, "looks like an all-in-one."
"What the hell is an all in one," Marge said and added, "help me visualize that."
"OK, it's a cloth diaper covered by plastic pants that usually closes with flaps. The ones I've seen, on babies that is, have elastic around the waist and legs that helps keep the water out so the diaper doesn't soak and sag," Mark said.
"And I suppose it keeps whatever the baby did inside the diaper, inside the diaper, right," Marge asked.
"Pretty much. I can see it on kids, but why an adult," Mark asked.
"Like I said, I don't have a clue. Look, that's pretty much all I got so far. Woman has a pool, she wants it cleaned daily and the pool guy, or girl I suppose, has to wear a swim diaper. If you want the job I'll call and bid on it, if not I'll call you if and when I get an opening, OK," Marge said.
"OK, I guess I'm kind of interested, but I've got a couple of questions like where would I even find a swim diaper that will fit me," Mark asked curiously.
"Supposedly she's already got them, or so she says. So does this mean you're interested or what," Marge asked.
"Not sure. I mean yes, sort of. The thing is, how public is this pool of her's," Mark asked.
"Honestly, I haven't seen the pool so I'm not sure about that either, but I can ask," Marge said and added, "makes sense that you'd not want to wear something like that in public."
"That's for sure," Mark said.
"So do I call her or not," Marge asked.
"Five hours for one hour of work? I'm definitely interested I guess, but I'd sure like a little more information," Mark said hesitating
"Then let me give her a call and get that taken care of," Marge said and added, "I'm a little curious myself now."
"What kind of scheduling? I mean that hour. When would I need to do the cleaning," Mark asked trying to imagine what he would look like in a swim diaper. It brought a smile to his face at the notion.
"Schedules up to you as far as I'm concerned. All she cares about is having it cleaned before noon. She uses the pool to exercise in the afternoon or evening. That pretty much leaves it up to you when you do it, just as long as it's done before noon," Marge said and added, "and it's heated."
"Heated is nice. OK, yes, I guess I'm interested," Mark said.
"Good lad, gutsy. Tell you what, I'll call her a little later, bid the job and then call you if she takes the offer. Can I reach you at this number," Marge said looking at the phone number on Mark's resume.
"Yes, that's my cell," Mark said.
"Good enough. Wait, never mind you're already here. Let me call her now and get it over with," Marge said as she picked up the phone. She dialed, waited and then smiled at Mark.
"Ms. Pennyworth? Hi, it's Marge Hanson of Hanson's pools. Look, I've got a young man willing to clean your pool. Yes, he will do so on your terms, so that means we can accommodate you. Great. Also, he needs to know how private this pool is? OK. Great. OK, OK, that's good and I'll pass that on," Rose said cupping the phone.
"It's very private," Rose said.
"Excellent," Mark answered as Rose went back to the conversation.
"Listen, I'm going to have to charge you on a daily basis to have someone out there five days a week. If that's agreeable I can have him start this Monday," Marge said before cupping the phone again to add, "OK, hold on."
"What's your waist size," Rose asked of Mark.
"26 inches," Mark said blushing at the thought he was being measured for a diaper.
"Did you get that? Right, 26 inches. Monday then. I'll have the young man bring a self addressed stamped envelope with the contract. You can sign it and mail it back," Marge said and added, "and thank you for your business."
"She accepted the bid," Mark said assuming the woman had when Rose hung up the phone.