My slide into babyhood

[Deewet_69]

The following are excerpts from a adult baby diary found a few years back at a garage sale.  I have no idea if it truely happened.

Saturday:

College is no different than the rest of my life.  Because of my size, I ‘m forgotten, looked over, lonely.  It might be better to be a dwarf, at least they don’t look like a kid, but me, I’m just little.  People mistake me for an eight year old and I have to buy all my clothes in the kids department.

I’ve always been a basketball fan, especially women’s basketball.  I’ve been to all the home games this winter and today, this nice lady came over and talked to me.  She had seen me at the games.

I could tell right away she used to play.  I felt so small sitting next to her – I swear she is over 6’3’’ tall.  We talked about the game and she bought me a drink and a dog, which always helps on my meager funds.

She indeed played center ten years ago and now coached a high school team.  Her name is Linda.

Now I can’t get her out of my mind or forget the feelings of being a child with her.


Tuesday:

I can’t believe it.  Linda was at the game again today and saved me a seat next to her.   After being so alone, it felt wonderful to have someone to talk with.  I swear I fell in love with her, which seeing our vast size difference is utterly ridiculous.  No doubt, she had tall basketball boyfriends and was just being nice to me, like a younger brother, but I just didn’t care.  She made me feel so comfortable, I didn’t mind the glances we got in line for a coke at half time. 

After the game, she had to leave, but she made me promise to be at the next game.  I can’t sleep thinking about her and wishing I wasn’t so little.

Thursday

I really don’t know how to start.  Linda called me and instead of going to the game, she picked me up and I spent the evening AT HER PLACE.   She cooked and we spent the evening talking and watching movies.  Nothing happen sexually, but I did fall asleep with my head in her lap.   I can barely keep my mind on school.

Friday

Spent the evening again at Linda’s.  The only problem is I don’t feel like we are on a date or anything.  She is so much taller than me I feel like a child.



Sunday

Today something really strange happened, I almost feel weird writing it down.  I fell asleep again with my head in her lap -- she likes me in her lap and it is so relaxing to have her play with my hair or rub my shoulders.  I awoke this time to her feeding me from a baby bottle.  At first, I was so drowsy, I just start suc-kling, but then I realized what was happening. 

She calmed me down, saying, “I just thought you could use the bottle and not have to get up for a drink.  And, you look so cute with it.”

I should have told her to stop, that I wanted to be her man despite out size difference.  I wanted to remind her that I was a 19-year-old man…but I didn’t.  Her eyes melted me and I let her feed me the bottle.   

The worse part is I hope she feeds me again.  How weird am I?

[Anonymous]

Wednesday



I had my first orgasm last night – well not my first – but my first given by someone else.   Linda wanted me to stop by after classes, so I took a bus over to her place.  I’m not sure how she can afford her two-story brick townhouse on a teacher salary.  It is really nice in one of the best neighborhoods around campus.  



My hands still shake when I think about it.  I’ll try to put everything down that happened.  Linda was dressed in a nice dress, one that might remind you that housewives wore in old TV shows.  She even had pearls around her neck.  



As she finished preparing dinner, I noticed a package of disposable diapers next to the lounge chair.  When I looked closer I saw they were for large kids.  



She called me in the kitchen and we had a nice dinner.  Our conversation was about things she had read about people playing games in the bedroom.  I could barely talk but head spinning about where I THOUGHT this was going…boy was I wrong.



“I want to baby you tonight,” she said.



I think I said okay.  Then she did something that really brought reality home for me.  She lifted me up to sit on the counter, so we could look at each other.  This showed me that I had no business thinking I could be a man to her.  I just wanted to leave.



But, I didn’t.  She told me the diapers in the living room were for me.  â€œWill you were them for me?”



What could I do?  Go back to my lonely cramped apartment.  

I jumped from the counter.  â€œI’m not sure how to put them on,” I said to her.



“Oh, I want to diaper you.”



This scared me.  Any thoughts she might have in making love with me would be shattered when she saw my tiny pen-is.



But, then again, the lonely apartment waiting for me.



She first had me put on a yellow tee-shirt, no doubt from the children’s department.  On the floor of the living room she spreaded out a blanket, patting it for me to lie on my back.  



“I don’t want you to laugh.”



She stopped me from saying anything more.  â€œHush, little Jimmy.



I dared not look in her eyes as she pulled off my pants and underwear.  I heard the crackling of the disposable diaper and lifted my hips so she could slide it under me.  She, bless her, made no comments about my size as she sprinkled baby powder and rubbed it in.   A step in our relationship happened when she taped the diaper closed…it was as if signified my acceptance as being her little one.



“Oh my,” she said in a whisper.  â€œThey fit you.  I can’t believe how cute these make you.”



I felt so exposed, only wearing a diaper and a shirt.  Like a little one, she carried me to the couch.  



We started watching a movie, me in my usual spot, head in her lap.  



“No need for you get up to go pee now,” she said.



“You want me to go in these?”  I couldn’t believe it.



She began to rub the front of my diaper, the plastic rustling so loud.  It began to feel really good and I must have moaned.  From nowhere, Linda produced a large pacifier and pushed it into my mouth. I suc-ked hard on it, ready to do anything for her, as long as she rubbed my diaper.  



When I came, I actually whimpered around my pacifier, the feeling was so great.  Waves of pent up emotions washed over me.   Just writing this has me excited and I start rubbing the diaper I’m wearing.  Yes, I’m wearing one because she asked me to take them home and wear.  Linda wants me to grow used to using them.  



I can’t wait for tomorrow.

[Anonymous]

Wednesday



School has kept me busy so I haven’t had time to write.  It is scaring me the hold Linda seems to have over me.  I haven’t seen her since Sunday, but I can’t help but obey her about the diapers.  Besides being outside, I’ve worn the Pampers all the time like she asked.  I feel guilty not wearing them under my jean to school, but the noise they make is too loud.  



Funny, I’m starting to like wearing them.  It is convenient not to stop doing homework or watching TV to go to the bathroom.  I’ve gotten to the point I can let it go without thinking much about it.  In fact, I am usually surprised how much I have wetting the diaper during changing.



Sleeping with them on at first was hard.  I kept waking up feeling guilty, like I was doing something wrong.  And my dreams are all about diapers and Linda.





Thursday



Linda called this morning.  She wanted to know how my diaper wearing was going.  I lied and told her I wore them under my jeans to school.  She wants me to come over tomorrow.  Said she has a surprise.



Well, karma got me for lying about the diapers.  I was sitting in the large study hall, engrossed in Lit work when I started wetting my pants.  I guess it was because I have been wearing the diaper at home while studying, my mind just decided to pee.   I stopped myself but not before I was soaked.  The only way to get out was too wait until I dried, which would be hours later or spill the pop I was drinking.  I went for the pop spilling.



Friday



Because of the accident, I wore diapers today to school.  Hopefully nothing important was taught because all I thought about were the diapers.  To hide the noise, I carried a noisy plastic bag from the grocery store.



It was nice not having to go to the bathrooms all day.  I always go in the stalls because of the urinal heights.  Since I live just off campus, I went home twice to change.



I’m worried about where all this headed.  I also think a lot about how much I love Linda.

[Anonymous]

More Friday



After I last wrote to you I got a package from UPS.  It was from Linda.  My hands trembled as I opened it.  Inside was a baby romper – well not a baby’s since it was big enough for me.  It was brown with a tan top and brown shorts bottom.  It had a zipper in the back and snaps at the crotch.  I let it fall to floor, frightened by it.



Her note in the package begged me to wear it to her house this evening, diapered of course.  She wanted me to stay for the weekend, “no reason to pack.”



No doubt, she planned this to be a weekend of playing baby.  



Knowing this, I closed all my curtains tight and stripped down to my diaper.  The first thing I did was tape on a clean diaper then I stepped into the romper.  Getting the zipper up in the back was a struggle.  I had snapped the crotch before putting the romper on.  



It felt…well very strange being in the romper.  It made me feel very small and young.  Then I noticed something else had fallen from the package.  It was a little lock and a note.  I was to click it shut on the zipper to show my trust.  



For almost a half and hour I sat looking at the lock, knowing I’d be locked in this romper until she let me out.  But, in the end, I trusted her and locked it in place.



Since I have no car, driving is so hard at my size, I will have to take the campus shuttle bus to her place.    



I’ll let you know on Monday how my weekend goes.  



Darn, I should have gone to the bathroom before locking myself in this romper.

[Anonymous]

Sunday night



I should be doing homework but I can’t think straight at all after this weekend, so much happened.



Locked and diapered in my romper I had no choice but to go to Linda’s for the weekend.  She had said not to pack anything, but I still thought to take an overnight bag with some clothes in case I changed my mind after getting there – little did I know at that point she wouldn’t give me a chance to control anything for the weekend.  



My first problem was how to get to her place dressed like this.  She probably thought I’d just drive over, but because of money and my smallness, I didn’t have a car.  The only way for me to get there was by the campus bus.



Good thing it has turned chilly and I could at least wear a coat.  Unfortunately, the bottom of the romper bubbled out like a baby’s with elastic around the legs.  I thought to wear sweat pants over them on the bus, but her instructions told me to wear just the romper and for some stupid reason, like a child, I was afraid to disobey.



In the end, I wore a long coat, a little to heavy for the weather.



Of course, my luck the bus was almost full.  I ended up sitting next to this nice looking older woman, Mexican I think.   If felt as if she and the others stared at me in my coat, as if my secret was exposed.



Another unfortunate thing, I had to pee badly and the bouncy ride on the bus didn’t help.  Cautiously, I released into my waiting diaper.  A real rush flowed through my body with my wetting.   There I was, sitting in the midst of people, wearing a baby romper hidden under my coat, secretly wetting my diaper.

 

The Mexican woman kept glancing over at me.  I worried that she heard the rustling of my diaper as the bus jostled us.   At one point, she asked me in heavy accented English, if where my parent were and if I need help on knowing my stop.



Most times, I get real defensive when someone confuses me for a kid, but this time, dressed as I was, I played along and told her, thanks, but I was going to my aunts place.  I can’t explain the nice comforting feeling of her concern.  It must have been the wet diaper making me a little crazy.



My first big surprise of the weekend was at Linda’s front door.    I’ll write more in a few, but I need to change my diaper and get some homework done first.

[Anonymous]

Okay, I’m back with a fresh disposable diaper on me.  Funny how things change.  On Friday, the disposable felt heavy and thick between my legs, but after a weekend of thick cloth diapers, this feels life I’m not wearing a diaper.



Back to the front door surprise.  When the two tall girls opened Linda’s front door, I thought I might have gone to the wrong house.  It really freaked me, but as I stammered to say I must have made a mistake, the tallest…and I might add, big as a football player…just stepped out and picked me up as if I were a kid.



How adorable, she said as I was helpless carried into Linda’s place.  When she held me, my hidden diaper crinkled loudly, making me want to hide with embarrassment.  Linda yelled from the kitchen to put me on the blanket in the living room.



I wanted so much at that point to run home, figuring I’d cut my way out of the romper.  The girl sat me on a large blanket, adorned with a design of babies playing with rattles.  I have never felt as small as I did sitting there on the floor, looking up at the smiling girls.



“Take off that coat, silly,” said Linda as she came into the room.  â€œShow Debbie and Cindy the cute romper I sent you.”



My eyes were fixed on what Linda carried.  To looked to a real diaper and light blue plastic pants.  I started to protest, but she pent over and stuck a pacifier in my mouth.  



“No more talking for you.”



I just couldn’t open my coat and expose my shame to these girls, so Linda knelt next to me, put down her supplies, and unbuttoned my coat for me.



The girls squealed with delight, saying how cute I was in my little romper.



“Time to get you into some real diapers.”



At that point, resistance was stupid.  What was I to do, run outside and take a bus home in my romper.  Linda pushed me down on my back.   I looked up at the ceiling and the smiling faces as she unsnapped the crotch of the romper.



“Look, she’s wet.”



The pronoun didn’t escape me.  



I can’t describe the emotions that went through me as she changed me in front of the others.  I closed my eyes and the disposable was torn open.  The air in the room felt cool against my exposed wet skin.  When she started wiping me and then rubbing baby powder around my area I could feel myself growing excited.



“It is so little and cute.  She likes her diapers doesn’t she?”

“We should get ride of her nasty hair.”



Linda got up, leaving me exposed on the blanket.   In a minute she returned and I felt shaving cream being applied down there.  My pubic hair is blond and very light so he didn’t take long before I was as smooth as a baby down there.



Thankfully she had me lift my bottom so she could slide the cloth diaper under me.  In a moment she had it tightly pinned on me.  Next she worked the plastic pants up my legs and again I had to lift so she could get these over the bulging diaper.



And bulging was right.  After she snapped the crotch on my romper she pulled me up to stand.  The diaper bubbled way out in my romper, leaving nothing to doubt that I was diapered.

[Anonymous]

One thing I realized then was Linda and the two girls liked showing their power over me by carrying me around.  Linda  reached down and picked me up, her arms cradling my padded behind as I instinctively wraps my little arms around her neck.



“I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about Debbie and Cindy,” said Linda.   “I was their coach a few years back and…well… I let out our secret and they –“



“We loved the idea of playing baby with you,” said Debbie.



“We can be your aunts.”



“Your dirty aunts.”



Linda laughed.  â€œWill one of you get Nancy’s bottle.”



My head was already spinning and calling me Nancy didn’t help.



Linda cradled me like a baby and took the bottle from Cindy.  Out came by pacifier and she teased me with the nipple.  â€œCome on, I know you’re hungry.”



Surprisingly and a little disturbing was I began to enjoy our playacting.  The bottle felt right in my mouth and cradled in her strong arms, wearing a diaper and plastic pants, I relaxed and suc-kled the bottle.



The milk was warm and sweet, not really all that good tasting.  Linda and the girls talked as if I weren’t there, making plans to buy me dresses and frillies from Ebay.    Debbie had a laptop and kept showing me pictures of the things they were going to buy.  It sure appeared they were planning more than this weekend to have me in diapers and dresses.



I wasn’t sure on how to take this turn – me being made into a baby girl.  Although little, and despite being approached by more than one man in the past, I never considered myself gay, nor did I entertain wearing girls clothes.  But, there I was, drinking from a baby bottle while they planed just that.  



Halfway through the bottle I had a problem.  All my life I have had digestive problems – having to go in a hurry.  I knew the signs in my stomach and also when it came, I had little time to get to a bathroom.  The last thing I wanted to do was this in front of the girls.



I pulled back from the bottle.



“I have to go to the bathroom,” I pleaded.



Linda pushed the bottle back into my mouth.  â€œSilly, you’re wearing a diaper all this weekend.  There is no bathroom for you.”



“But, you don’t understand,” I cried around the nipple.



She just smiled and patted my plastic pants.  



I couldn’t focus on the bottle as my stomach turned and I felt the unavoidable pressure at my behind.  The muscles started convulsing as I tried to delay the inevitable.  



Everyone stopped talking, there eyes on me as I squirmed.  



Then it happened.  My muscles tired and in a smelling, hot rush, I filled my diaper.